Courtesy Lauren Holly

Please welcome Lauren Holly for a one-time celebrity blog!

Best known for her roles in Dumb and Dumber and on NCIS and Picket Fences, the actress, 49, is currently starring in ABC’s new summer show, Motive.

In addition to her acting career, Holly is also mom to sons Azer, 11, George, 10, and Henry, 9, with husband Francis Greco.

She can be found on Facebook and Twitter @LaurenHolly.

In her blog, Holly compares her younger years to her boys’ childhood — and wonders if she should be worried for what’s to come.

I’ve been forced to examine myself as a mother. Am I what I thought I would be? Did childhood behaviors conceive my parenting skills?

There have been a number of events that happened recently that have brought on my introspection. One mood seeps from my past into my future and I welcome its attendance. Humor. I laugh at myself as a teenage dumbass and I laugh at my predicament as Mom.

It all started benignly enough while cooking dinner. My youngest wanted to help with the cooking. The recipe called for ¼ teaspoon of cayenne pepper. I tossed the measuring spoons to him, forgetting that he was standing on a step stool in order to work at the counter.

“How much?” he asked. Distracted by my own mixing I said, “A 1 and a 4.”

Dinner was torturous. Gasping and choking we came to find out he had interpreted my direction as four times the one. The big spoon. We went through the McDonald’s drive thru — an occurrence that has become way more frequent lately than I used to boast. Still, they did change that horrid fry oil, didn’t they?

It wasn’t until we finished our Quarter Pounders that I found out that my youngest, the chef, had had another issue that day. I had enrolled him on a computer website loved by his big brothers, a site that I had already checked out thoroughly.

That had become my common practice ever since the Christmas debacle. Then the boys had each gotten a laptop from Santa, all set up and ready to surf. After all the wrapping had exploded throughout the room, I scooted them out to try to regain order. It took me about 20 minutes until I called them to eat.

At bedtime that night, my oldest asked, “Why do men kiss women’s private parts?” He and his brothers had seen pictures on their computers. #$%$$#@!!! We forgot the parental controls — “hot chicks” could be searched. In 20 minutes. I couldn’t even turn a computer on until after college. Are you kidding me?

Anyway, Club Penguin seemed made for kids. Fun harmless games, and cute waddling penguins whom you could dress up and make talk. My little sweet boy put a hat on his and took him promptly to the screen where he could see some school friends’ charges. He waddled his up to another and typed his greeting. “Hi Ass.” With false pride he told me he was kicked out of his Arctic world for A WHOLE YEAR!

Ah yes, the bad words. My three are obsessed with them. I had always thought my thoughtful middle one was immune to that infection — that is until I heard him whisper the F word angrily to his brother over the intercom.

Even “boner” is on the list. Yup, that gem came from a 12-year-old neighborhood demon. My oldest son confided, “We have awesome talks when we lay on the trampoline and look at the sky.” Obviously.

My three wonderful little men had managed to add to their already full repertoire of farts, burps and endless mentions of other equally intriguing bodily functions. Where are my dainty girlie girls playing dress-up with their Barbies, quietly and in the corner? Why were these noxious things in my house and why did they multiply on the weekends?

I made more rules and gave out more rewards. I yelled, gave mean looks and sentenced consequences. I even tried 30-second free reign. That’s when I take them all into my bedroom and let them talk like sailors while I watch the watch. Oh, what joy this brings!

Hopefully some tactic worked well enough that when they leave my house they don’t cause me embarrassment. After all, my biggest concern, unfortunately truthful, is what will others think?

When I was their age, my memory is that I was an angel. From what I heard, my tantrum phase was over and we were smooth sailing. No more throwing myself on the ground and screaming loud and foul when I was told no. Charming.

No, my recollection of punishment inducing behaviors really comes into focus on my teenage years. There was the yearbook photo of me in my cheerleading uniform walking furtively between two friends. Seemingly innocuous, yet it hid many facts in plain sight. Both friends were part of the pot crowd. I was carrying a brown-papered bottle of Jack Daniels.

I had signed a creed vowing to abstain from many things. I had already had a warning — or the Friday night hell ride that erased my savings. See, my parents had decided to go to my grandparents and take my brothers for the weekend. They trusted me to stay alone, except for my best friend who would stay with me.

I’m sure they felt even more secure by leaving us with the light blue Plymouth Valiant, the car with the stick shift on the wheel. Both of us only had our learner’s permit. I couldn’t drive it — especially without a licensed driver — and not past 9 p.m. anyway. Didn’t matter. They were gone and we were going.

We realized pretty quickly that first gear was all we were getting. Still, the idea of going out in our car trumped going fast. All the way down to the lake parking lot we cruised. Friends were there hanging out drinking and talking. The thing the cool people do. That night we belonged. ‘Rents were gone, no curfew and we had our own car.

It was past midnight when the party crashed and we started our slow drive home up. “Started” being the most important word in that sentence. See, about half way there is a hill with a stop sign at the top. We have to cross a busy road at that intersection, as it is the only way home. Did I mention that I had to come to a complete stop at the top of that hill in order to check traffic before I go?

Back to the stick shift on the wheel. I couldn’t do it. It was look to avoid death and then roll back. Over and over again. At first the two of us found this extremely funny. Then the funniest thing became that we thought that the situation was funny. That chorus just kept playing.

Then we really lost control around three in the morning. I swear it was because of the laugh spasms gripping my body, but those backward rolls got longer and more erratic. That is to say every mailbox or flowerbed was taken out on the left side of the hill and beyond.

The racket woke the neighborhood and the police were called. Someone was watching over us — the officer who responded to the call was a relative of my boyfriend. I had to repair the damage with apologies, and then he even held traffic.

The rest of my weekend consisted of planting and $$. The biggest expense was the car. Varsity jacket? Nope. Ski club? Not this year. My coffers were barren. Somehow my parents didn’t find out until years later. Amazing since the color they painted that Valiant was thankfully discontinued along with that auto. Almost a match…

See, my worry is if those things happen to an earlier angel, what happens to a naughty boy? This is what keeps me up at night after a penguin blackballs my kid. Is there a cycle I need to break?

After all, it was my mother who gave my godmother a haircut. Long, lustrous hair was left intact on only one side of her head, the other side trimmed to the scalp.

Yeah, I fear there is trouble ahead. Hopefully, I’ll keep on laughing while I figure it out.

– Lauren Holly

Please help us welcome back celebrity blogger Garcelle Beauvais!

Best known for her roles on The Jamie Foxx Show and NYPD Blue, the actress, 45, formerly starred on TNT’s Franklin & Bash. Her new movie, White House Down, is in theaters now.

Aside from acting, Beauvais just published her first children’s book, I Am Mixed.

Mom to three sons — Oliver, 22, and 5½-year-old twins Jax and Jaid — Beauvais supports the Step Up Women’s Network and is also active with March of Dimes, Children Uniting Nations and Yéle Haiti Foundation.

She can be found on Twitter @GarcelleB.

In her latest blog, the actress shares her thoughts (and hopes) on how women view their bodies — and says beauty isn’t just about being skinny.

Me and my boys with my book! – Courtesy Garcelle Beauvais

Recently, I posted a picture on Instagram of the iconic Marilyn Monroe. In it, she’s lounging back in a yellow bikini.

Ms. Monroe didn’t have steel arms or abs. Her stomach was soft. Her thighs were luscious. Her breasts responded to gravity, and she was known as one of the most beautiful women in history. The note with the picture encouraged women to celebrate this type of body and embrace their own figures.

So today I want to ask: Where did the wonderful appreciation for natural, womanly curves go? Why are we all trying to be skinny skinny skinny? I mean, really, who decided this was the only way to be beautiful or worthy? Seriously, I’d like to talk to them.

As an actress, I portray characters that are supposed to resemble real people. But I have to ask: In what version of real life is every woman a size 2?! Shouldn’t characters — like people — come in all shapes and sizes?

The pressure to look trim and taut all of the time is getting worse. Women aren’t even cut some slack for being pregnant. In a very disturbing trend, all of these body-after-baby ads heap pressure on new moms to lose the weight as quickly as possible. The messages in the media seem to tell women that they should head directly from the delivery room to the gym.

I’d like the message to become: How to get healthy after baby!

I must admit that I bought into it and succumbed to the pressure, too. Just eight weeks after giving birth to my twin sons Jax and Jaid, I was photographed in a cutout bathing suit, saying, “Look what I did!” As if losing the pregnancy weight so rapidly was just as important as the birth of my precious babies.

I’ve always loved Drew Barrymore, but I admire her even more since she’s given birth to her daughter Olive. I loved when she recently told PEOPLE, “It took nine months to build it, and it will take nine months to unbuild it.” She’s taking her time to lose the weight, and she’s not falling for the societal demands to do it quickly.

The lovely Marilyn – Earl Theisen/Getty

In my line of work, appearance matters. There’s no way around it. I show up for a job and immediately meet with the wardrobe person. Within two minutes of walking on set, I’m stripping down in front of her and maybe a couple of her assistants.

Actors have to try on clothes and be photographed in them so the director can see the selections. So every time I go to work, I feel utterly exposed. God forbid if I’ve gained five pounds — under the prying eyes of a film crew, it feels more like 30! Coupled with the fact that the camera adds 10 pounds, this can really make you insecure.

I read somewhere that Gwyneth Paltrow works out for two hours a day, but who wants to do that? Yes, she’s beautiful and she looks great, but personally, I’d rather spend that time with my kids, or go shopping, or eating or seeing friends. I’d pretty much rather spend two hours doing anything but grunting and sweating at the gym!

When I was growing up, I went to the movies and saw women onscreen who had curves, butts, and soft edges. Unfortunately, the term “curvy” in this business has come to denote anyone who is not bone thin and flat. I’ve even heard models who could probably wear a size zero refer to themselves as “curvy.” Yikes!

It’s funny to me when I see actresses transform from the way they look when they first started working to how they begin to look as soon as the skinny seed is planted in their heads.

Now it seems that everyone who is on TV or in magazines is toned to the max with firm arms, hard tummies and a defined six-pack. Just once, I’d like to hear one of Jennifer Aniston’s characters say she’s having a FAT day.

I grew up in a Haitian household where we ate rice and beans and plantains (fried bananas) every day. We feasted on chicken and beef cooked in rich sauces. I’ve always thought that carbs were my friends, but now of course, I know better.

I can’t help but wonder if there’s a double standard when it comes to weight? Because it seems that men such as John Goodman, Keenan Thompson and Kevin James can have great careers and still be on the heavier side. Don’t get me wrong: They’re great actors and I’m glad that they’re successful. But why can’t it be that way for women?

When you think about it, it’s ironic because when you’re working on set, there is so much delicious food around. Craft service provides tons of tempting selections for lunch, dinner and extra meals for longer shoots. Food is always available. So what are we supposed to do? Just walk past the tables or just pick out a carrot and water? I think not.

One of my work “glam” shots – Russell Baer

I know that I have chosen a profession where looks are extremely important. But I see this message — that being skinny is of the utmost significance — spreading well beyond the confines of Hollywood. This worries me.

For someone who always wanted to have a daughter, in a way I’m happy I don’t because the pressure starts early for little girls. Recently, a 6-year-old little girl at my sons’ school asked me if the box of raisins in her hand was fattening. That broke my heart because this cycle of weight obsession continues and affects girls who are so young.

Ladies, I think we’ve done this to ourselves. We never spoke up and said, “Enough.” Instead, we started competing with each other to see how skinny we could get.

Whenever someone loses weight we say, “Wow, you lost weight…” And even before you finish the compliment the person says, “Thank you!” We base our success on our size. When you think about it, doesn’t that seem ridiculous?

I wish we would say to each other, “Wow, you look healthy!” And not just say it when we think someone has lost weight. Why not say it when we see someone with glowing skin and a big smile?

My first step in changing my own mindset has come in the dressing room. I no longer care what size the label says in my clothes. If the jeans or dress or bathing suit that I try on fits and looks awesome, there is no number or letter on the label that will influence my decision about whether or not to buy it.

So I have an idea: Let’s start a trend and put our health above just being skinny. Let’s support each other. Let’s demand roles in film and television for women of all shapes and sizes. Let’s not talk about our obsession with dieting in front of our kids. And let’s build each other up rather than use size to compete and tear each other down. Change is possible. But it has to start with us.

Be confident girls: you are HOT, you are sexy — you are a Marilyn. So don’t let any man, media or moment of judgment ever take away your confidence!

I would love to hear your thoughts or suggestions on spreading the word.

– Garcelle Beauvais

More from Garcelle’s PEOPLE.com blog series:

• Garcelle Beauvais’s Blog: A Few of My Favorite Things
• Garcelle Beauvais’ Blog: Dating as a Single Mom
• Garcelle Beauvais’ Blog: How I Got Through My Husband’s Betrayal

Candid with my cutie – The Cradle Chronicles

Celebrity blogger Jenna von Oy is a new mama!

Best known for her roles as Six on Blossom and Stevie on The Parkers, von Oy is also a musician who has released two albums and is set to publish a book, The Betweeners.

von Oy, 36, wed Brad Bratcher on Oct. 10, 2010, and resides in Nashville with her husband and five dogs.

They welcomed their first child, daughter Gray Audrey, in May 2012. She is now 15 months old.

You can find her on Facebook and Twitter @JennavonOy, as well as posting on her weekly blog, The Cradle Chronicles.

In her latest blog, von Oy writes about the time-honored tradition of going back to school — and Gray’s baby steps in that direction.

When I was a child, the phrase “back to school” elicited a mixture of both fear and delight in me. What fantastic summer vacation stories would my friends return with? Would they think I was a total dork because I didn’t have any? Would I still (embarrassingly) be the shortest person in my class? Would my new teachers be nice, or would they plot my demise like the principal in Ferris Bueller? Would I be suffering through hours of homework each week, eclipsing my ability to watch Melrose Place? Would any boys like me this year? (And would I know it, even if they did?) Would I break out in inevitable and mortifying stress-acne before tests? And the biggest question of all … drumroll, please… what should I wear on my first day back to class?!

Mind you, that particular assignment required hours of closet perusal, multiple department store outings, a box of tissue to wipe away any melodramatic tears, and one VERY patient mother. I was convinced the right outfit could earn me a prominent place at the popular kids table. Alternately, the wrong one could indefinitely fortify my position as the last pick in every gym class dodgeball game until the end of time. Heaven forbid! I had such a preoccupation with what statement my clothes were or weren’t making, that I kept journals of my favorite get-ups. Sometimes I was even ambitious enough to take Polaroids, for better documentation. God bless the neurotic and overzealous younger me! I was enthralled with being fashion-forward, while simultaneously stuck in the mentality that jumping on the small-town, conservative bandwagon was equivalent to fitting in.

I was certain that expressing myself through my unique sense of style would directly, not to mention negatively, affect my social status. That is, of course, if I’d actually had a bona fide social status to begin with. Which I didn’t. And, despite wearing exactly the same conventional (aka banal and indistinguishable) threads everyone else was donning, I still roamed the middle school corridors feeling as if I stuck out like a sore thumb. Meanwhile, my artistic spirit was dissolving into that sterile, over-lit, hall monitor-supervised background until it was non-existent. It was experiencing a slow, agonizing death by self-imposed conformity. Shallow, perhaps, but I didn’t have bills and a mortgage to fret over in those days, so I think I’ll let that slide.

First day of kindergarten – 1983 – The Cradle Chronicles

Although I’ve been out of school for several decades (ouch, that hurts to say!), the end of summer still gives way to that “back to school” thrill. It reminds me of the good old days: scouring the preparatory summer reading list, stocking up on every protractor-calculator-ruler-related gadget on the market, and searching for the ideal caddy to house my ever-growing eraser collection. I recall the arduous hunt for a (nearly-impossible-to-find) Trapper Keeper that wasn’t plastered with photos of New Kids On The Block; I may have been the only adolescent girl in America who couldn’t fathom wanting to make out with one of those guys. And then there was the daunting task of locating a backpack that articulated just the right thing about me: “I’m cool and confident enough for the ‘It Crowd,’ just awkward enough to be endorsed by all of my other peers, and serious enough to be respected by teachers everywhere. Pretty please accept me, people!”

I realize my daughter is only 15 months old, so the term “back to school” doesn’t carry quite as much weight at this point and time. That said, prepping for her fall daycare program has brought a flood of memories to the surface. It takes me back to passing notes in Social Studies, giggling uncontrollably during study hall, skimming Cliff’s Notes for English Lit, and boycotting frog dissection in biology. (Which, in retrospect, was an early demonstration of my love for animal rescue.)

I find I miss the sound of lockers slamming. You know the ones I mean — the old slabs of metal stuffed with crumpled papers, hair scrunchies, and half-chewed pen caps, then festooned with magazine clippings of teen heartthrobs such as Luke Perry and Keanu Reeves. (Thankfully, my friends were considerate enough to hide the Joey Lawrence photos when I came around.) I can recall the wild stampede as the morning bell rang and students shuffled off to homeroom, or ditched to the local Dunkin’ Donuts.

I recollect my gruesome discovery of stale gum on the underbelly of my desk, and my palpable desperation as I counted down to our daily recess or lunch. The flashbacks are so vivid I can almost feel the chalk on my fingers and taste the coagulated cafeteria Jell-O… Which, on second thought, I could have gone without remembering.

At 11 in my 1988 school photo – The Cradle Chronicles

But back to how this pertains to parenting.

In a sense, Gray has already embarked upon her learning journey, even though she’s only attending daycare for two days each week. She doesn’t need to write her own name in cursive, or be able to add apples and oranges, in order to be considered a student in my book. At the moment, she just happens to be a student of social skills and learning to eat Cheerios with an Elmo spoon.

Now, if you’re anything like me, the concept of “daycare” dredges up some strange visual illustrations. I never went to any sort of preschool or Montessori when I was younger, so my thoughts initially ran amuck. Before enrolling her, I imagined vaguely uncivilized scenes: twenty-something year-old babysitters with little (or no) teaching experience, chasing after hoards of screaming, drooling children, in a padded room where unstructured chaos ensued until work-weary and coffee-dependent parents could find the time to pick them up in between meetings.

Thankfully, this couldn’t be further from the truth, at least in Gray’s case, and I’m almost ashamed to have assumed such an awful scenario in the first place. Gray’s daycare is truly an accredited institution, with highly qualified teachers who are loving and attentive. In other words, it is exactly what school should be. The kids are essentially being treated to well-supervised educational play, meant to motivate them while still respecting age-appropriate boundaries. By that, I mean they aren’t forcing them to conduct lab experiments or solve algebraic formulas at age one. It’s gentle preparation for their future lessons, both in and out of the classroom, and I’m thoroughly impressed by it.

Not to mention, Gray comes home with some freakin’ adorable paintings we can post on our refrigerator! Her school really stresses music and creativity, which couldn’t make my husband and I happier. She has fantastic communication opportunities with fellow toddlers, and she is constantly being challenged, which she thrives on. (This is my polite way of saying our daughter is a little social butterfly who craves continual stimulation and entertainment. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree!)

Patiently waiting – The Cradle Chronicles

If I’m being honest, having her at daycare two days a week also allows me to get a little work done. I miss her terribly when she’s gone, and that’s putting it mildly. I’m like a turtle without its shell. (What the heck am I going to do when she goes off to college, if the separation is this tough already?!) Still, I know it’s good for me to have some time to catch up.

Moreover, Gray loves it, so I’m all for encouraging her independence. One day soon, I will be waving goodbye (and openly weeping, I’m sure) as Gray climbs onto the bus for her first day of Kindergarten, just as my mother did. I’m sure that’s when the real adventure will begin. But I’m in no rush to skip over these simpler days. There will be plenty of time for debate club, prom, yearbook committee, homework, and — God forbid–detention.

For now, I’m content with our slow and steady pace.

Until next time,

– Jenna von Oy

P.S. I love hearing from you, so I’ll pose this question: What’s the thing you miss most about your former school days?

P.P.S. For more “awesome” back-to-school photos from my younger days, head over to my blog at www.cradlechronicles.com!

More from Jenna’s PEOPLE.com blog series:

• Jenna von Oy’s Blog: Mom’s the Word
• Jenna von Oy’s Blog: Having Our Cake (and Eating It, Too)
• Jenna von Oy’s Blog: Happy Birthday to My Sweet Gray

Courtesy Paula Garces

Please give a warm welcome to our new celebrity blogger, Paula Garces!

Widely known for her role in the Harold & Kumar franchise, the actress currently stars in Lifetime’s new hit show, Devious Maids as well as All My Children.

In addition to acting, Garces, 39, is the mastermind behind the first Latina superhero video game, Aluna.

Already mom to daughter Skye, 21, Garces is currently expecting another baby — a son!– with husband Antonio Hernandez in December.

You can find her on Facebook and Twitter @paulagarces1.

Hello Everyone,

Welcome to my very first baby blog! Please let me introduce the characters in my life.

Myself: Born in New York, but raised in Medellin, Colombia and Spanish Harlem, New York.

My sweet daughter Skye, who is 21. Yes, you read correctly — she is 21 years old. (I will get into that story in a second!) She is not only gorgeous on the outside, but she has the most beautiful heart and soul on the inside.

Skye is a free spirit, forgiving and tolerant of all. She’s ready for adventure, so open minded, curious, smart and so excited about life and ready for love. (I’m not ready for that part in her life, LOL, she’s my lil’ big girl.)

Skye is in her third year of college and is a TV and film major — the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. She is super talented and full of ideas and I am so proud of her. She truly is the inspiration of my life, she is the reason why I am the woman I am today. Skye is my everything and her little baby brother-to-be is so lucky to have a big sister like her. Skye, I love you!

My handsome husband Antonio. We’ve been married for 10 years, but have been friends for more then 12 years. The love of my life, my best friend, business partner and an amazing friend and stepdad to my daughter Skye. I know he will be an amazing father to our son.

I look back and laugh because we met at a dance club in New York City! He’s a fantastic salsa dancer and that’s sexy in my eyes. The good thing is, we were very good friends for five years before we even kissed! Talk about persistence (on Tony’s part) and never giving up on me! But when that day arrived — we kissed, it was instant sparks and it’s never stopped! He loves me passionately and being a true LATINA, I can’t get enough of it.

Also important to me: My mother Victoria, mother-in-law Carmen, my sister Vanessa (her kids Lilly, Gabe, Isa and Luca) and my best friend, Stacey M.

Okay, now that you know my inner circle, let’s go back 21 years. You see, the first time I got pregnant, I was a young girl — I was 17 years old. Although I knew right away I wanted to keep my child, being a pregnant teen was a very scary experience for me. Luckily, my family and friends were very supportive and were there for me every step of the way.

Now that Skye is 21, this is the time when most couples/parents think, “GREAT, FREEDOM! Let’s do us as a couple with NO kids.” But the truth is my husband and I have been trying to have a baby for four years. Now, four years — and two miscarriages — later this beautiful baby bump for us is a miracle! This December, Skye, Tony and I will welcome a baby boy.

Courtesy Paula Garces

Although I am six months pregnant, I am busier than ever with work. I just finished my last three episodes of Devious Maids on Lifetime. I’m currently filming All My Children for OWN network and I’m also just been on location in Toronto filming an episode of Warehouse13 on Syfy channel. And that’s just work in front of the camera!

Behind the camera, I debuted my comic book hero ALUNA at San Diego’s Comic Con in July, did a few signing sessions with the fans, attended a few events, did some interviews and recorded the voice for the online video game character, Aluna.

I am also working with Allegory Media, Sekret Agent productions (Assassins Creed writers) and my team from my production company Further Lane Productions on the new Aluna trilogy books that must be ready by October this year — when I’m 7½ months pregnant.

Do you think I have a full plate? I know it’s a lot — especially while six months pregnant — but I am grateful and blessed.

After 21 years — wow. I forgot how it felt to be pregnant! Everything I ate in the first trimester seems to leave a bad taste in my mouth — it’s called dysgeusia. It may sound disgusting, but it’s a very common symptom for pregnant women. I literally had to sleep with a spitting bucket next to my bed (I guess I know what a cowboy that chews tobacco feels like).

It’s not easy spitting and feeling sick around my husband — especially at bedtime. But it comes with the territory of being pregnant. I’ve read that some mothers-to-be don’t experience these symptoms at all … All I have to say is that they are really lucky and should try playing Lotto.

I’m now in the middle of my second trimester and my body has really started to change. I can feel and see the weight gain coming. My first instinct was to go and sweat it off at the gym, but because of my last two miscarriages, I’m following my doctor’s advice to take it easy.

I am eager to go to my next doctor’s appointment, so I can discuss with her the possibility of starting to exercise. You see, I believe it’s very important to try to keep up with a light workout regiment throughout the pregnancy for many reasons:

1. I’m Latina and I love my Spanish food
2. Crazy pregnancy cravings
3. I would like to fit back into the skinny jeans I bought before I got pregnant
4. I already have work lined up for 2014 in front of the camera

Thank you guys for reading my first blog. Stay tuned for my next one, which will be more in-depth on this beautiful journey I call “Creation of Life.”

Besitos,

– Paula Garces

My happy camper – Courtesy Elisa Donovan

Thanks for welcoming our celebrity blogger, Elisa Donovan!

Best known for her roles as Amber in Clueless and Morgan on Sabrina, the Teenage Witch, Donovan recently starred in the ABC Family franchise The Dog Who Saved Christmas. She is the narrator of the audiobook for Sheryl Sandberg’s best-seller, Lean In.

Donovan, 42, is also a writer and yogi. A recovered anorexic, she assists in counseling and supporting young women struggling with eating disorders.

She lives in San Francisco with her husband, Charlie Bigelow, and their 16-month-old daughter Scarlett Avery.

She can be found on Facebook, as well as Twitter @RedDonovan.

Let’s be clear: I’m not a hypochondriac. I don’t go to the doctor every time I stub my toe or get a paper cut.

In fact, I once broke my toe dancing in my own living room at a dinner party (“…has the couch always been RIGHT THERE…?”), and although the pain was pretty intense (Have you ever broken a toe? For such a tiny appendage, when whacked at just the right angle, it packs a wallop of pain) I continued to dance on it for another half an hour or so.

Then when it swelled up like a puffer fish, I merely elevated it for a minute or two, had another chardonnay and kept dancing. It took me almost a week (and being unable to get my shoe on) in order for me to break down and go to the doctor.

I tell you this sweet story not so that you will question my judgment/sanity/wine drinking/vision (how did I not see my own couch?), but so that you understand that I’m not an alarmist.

So why is it, now that I have a child, I have become a crazy-doctor-dialing-over-diagnosing-paranoid-nutcase?

Family pool day in LA – Courtesy Elisa Donovan

Scarlett is an unusually chill kid. She’s reflective and observant. She’s like a zen master. She only cries when she’s hungry, tired or needs her diaper changed. And even then, it’s brief. She loves being around people, and is generally content and super easy. This is great for us.

The problem with this is when she does cry for more than 30 seconds, I’m convinced she has developed some severe illness that must be tended to immediately. Charlie, of course, thinks I am a lunatic.

“What are you going to tell the doctor? ‘I’m here because my kid is crying?’ You sound insane.” And he is right. I do sound like a loon. Yet, in the moment, I am certain that Scarlett has typhoid fever.

Kids get colds all of the time. I am perfectly aware of this. And I also know all of the basic things to do to help treat them: the cool air vaporizer, steaming them in the shower, a little Tylenol if they run a low fever, keep them hydrated, elevate their heads if you can when they sleep … And yet …

So one day Scarlett had a cold, and she’d had it for about four days. Even though I’ve been told by the ped that colds can last for over a week, I’m starting to think that something must be really WRONG. So I find myself dialing the doc once again and leaving yet another message on the nurse voicemail, trying to sound super relaxed and nonchalant:

“Hey there, hi — it’s Scarlett’s mom. How’s it going? So listen, just wanted to check in real quick. Scarlett is umm, sort of acting weird and she’s sort of crying and so you know … no biggie, just wondering if I should bring her in…” I imagine the nurses staring at the telephone, laughing their butts off and rolling their eyes at me; and then shooting it out with rock/paper/scissors to decide who has to call me back.

And when they do call me back, they are so kind and so understanding of my neuroses that I think it must be a special breed of human that becomes a nurse in a pediatrician’s office; a human with extraordinary patience and an innate ability to repeat the same information to the same person multiple times without reaching through the phone and strangling the new mother on the other end.

Father/daughter on the plane to Cabo – Courtesy Elisa Donovan

Now that Scarlett is starting to walk, we have a whole new set of challenges: the inevitable falls. A week or two after the cold incident, I thought Scarlett had either a) an ear infection or b) a concussion. What led me to this conclusion? Not even an ill-advised scroll through WebMD. No, it was my own well-oiled “mother’s intuition” (read: irrational paranoia) that made me certain when Scarlett fell and hit her head on the carpeted and sponged floor, she had indeed given herself a concussion and probably an ear infection, too.

Pediatricians must take a very specific and thorough course in med school that teaches them how to say things to new parents that calmly and surely shake them back to sanity, for my doc’s response to my claim was a warm smile, a gentle hand on my shoulder, and this: “You should expect your child to have a somewhat regular bump on her head until she’s 5. At which point it will be replaced by bruised knees ’til she’s around 10. Kids fall. And they get up. You will know if something is really wrong. Believe me, you will know.”

All of which makes me wonder two things:

1) Can Scarlett, Charlie and I move into the peds office? Just temporarily, until Scarlett is like 18 or so.
2) How do we differentiate between instinct and madness? When is our real intuition speaking and when are we just having certifiably crazy thoughts? I mean, am I going to be the kind of mom who puts her kid on a leash with a helmet every time she leaves the house? I certainly hope not.

It’s just the realization that I am the one who is truly responsible for this little being — and I better make sure I get it right — is very powerful. It’s so tough to see your child in any kind of discomfort, you want to end the pain for them immediately.

I know that as time goes on, I will get more accustomed to the fact that Scarlett will have to learn some things on her own, that she will have to skin a few knees and get a couple of colds — and that none of these things are going to kill her.

And one day not too far away — and far sooner than when she will skin her first knee — she will say her first few coherent sentences; one of which might be, “Hey Mom, quit being crazy, I’m fine.” And I hope I will choose to believe her.

Way cooler than I’ll ever be – Courtesy Elisa Donovan

– Elisa Donovan

More from Elisa’s PEOPLE.com blog series:

• Elisa Donovan’s Blog: Parenting Is Not an Elective Sport
• Elisa Donovan’s Blog: The Waste of Talking About Our Waists
• Elisa Donovan’s Blog: How to Handle the First Week with Your Alien

Shady Ladies – Marla Sokoloff

Our celebrity blogger Marla Sokoloff is a new mama!

Since audiences first got to know her at age 12 as Gia on Full House, Sokoloff has had many memorable TV roles — Jody on Party of Five, Lucy on The Practice, Claire on Desperate Housewives – as well as turns on the big screen in Whatever It Takes, Dude, Where’s My Car? and Sugar & Spice.

Sokoloff, 32, also sings and plays guitar and released an album, Grateful, in 2005.

She wed her husband, music composer Alec Puro, in November 2009 and the couple — plus pup Coco Puro — make their home in Los Angeles.

You can find Marla, now mom to 19-month-old daughter Elliotte Anne, on Twitter.

Hello everybody — hope you all had a fantastic summer!

First things first … I cannot believe you guys didn’t tell me how much fun having an 18-month-old is! This has been the most exciting age by a landslide so far.

Miss Elliotte is talking up a storm and making my stomach ache with laughter on a daily basis. Her personality has completely blossomed and she is quite the little lady now!

Over the past few weeks she has become completely obsessed with everything makeup and jewelry. Every time I turn around she is digging through my purse trying to find the right shade of pink to apply to her forehead. Apparently we’ve been doing it completely wrong all these years, ladies!

Lovin’ lipstick – Marla Sokoloff

With no nudging on my part by the way, she has decided that she wants to be a total girly girl and has the purse (courtesy of Grandma Sokoloff) to prove it! I guess it’s time to hide the designer handbags…

For this month’s entry I thought we would revisit pregnancy. Some of us loved it, some of us hated it, but no matter how you feel about it, we all LOVE a celebrity doing it right? That way, they can get the swollen feet and the extra pounds while we sit back in our skinny jeans sipping champagne!

(Well, maybe not the last part but a girl can dream right?)

Meet my friend Rachael Leigh Cook, star of TNT’s Perception and mommy-to-be. If I told you how long Rachael and I have known each other it would make the two of us look old, but let’s just say we did a movie together at the start of our careers called The Baby-Sitters Club.

Me a.k.a. Cokie Mason and Rachael a.k.a Mary Anne Spier – Everett

Rachael took some time out of her busy schedule to answer some fun questions about being knocked up. Hope you guys enjoy!

Marla: Congrats on your pregnancy — you look absolutely amazing! Sooo … how are you feeling?

Rachael: Ahaha thank you! One of the best things about gestation is that people tell you that you look great, even when it is far from true. That said, I don’t turn down a compliment so thank you!

I feel a-okay so far. I know that a lot of women have horrendously difficult pregnancies so I am feeling very lucky. (Knock on wood!)

Marla: Have you had any nausea or weird ailments that you weren’t expecting? I recently read an interview with you where you talked about the ever-present “pregnancy brain.” I hate to be the one that tells you that when the baby comes out, that symptom increases by about 450 percent and turns into something called “mom brain.”

Rachael: Oh nooooo!! That is terrifying! I am running on precious few brain cells these days as is. Other weird ailments include spontaneous crying (sad songs, news items, and stories — This American Life, The Moth, etc. just KILL me these days!) and serious nesting instincts are setting in. Cleaning out the garage and basement, getting rid of old stuff just feels great.

One other strange side effect is that everybody else — whom I know to be normal sized — now looks positively emaciated to me. Perspective.

Rockin’ her Children’s Place jacket – Marla Sokoloff

Marla: Stop. You are adorably pregnant! Speaking of, any cravings? Please tell me something gluttonous like Taco Bell to make myself feel better about my 50 plus pregnancy pounds!

Rachael: Marla, you tiny thing, I don’t want to hear it!! You are hilarious and braver than I for even looking at the scale when you were carrying. Yeah, after I gained 30 pounds I stopped checking and started stepping on the scale backwards at my appointments. I just don’t care how much I gain at this stage as long as I know that the little stowaway is okay. No need to have a number associated with this excellent experience.

As for the cravings, I was shooting for the first six months so craft service was my best and worst craving ally. Anything was available to me at any given time. Taking particular punishment were citrus fruits, especially pineapple, popcorn and apple fritters. Forget it.

Marla: Well at least you got your fruit in there! It’s very refreshing to hear an actress say they don’t care about gaining weight even while pregnant, so thank you for your candor. I completely agree, as long as your little chicken is healthy, that’s truly all that matters. I don’t know about you, but I was just happy to not have to diet for the first time in well … forever! What has surprised you the most about being pregnant?

Rachael: How directly it can put you in touch with your own mortality. Knowing that you are, in some ways, growing your “replacement” in a cosmic sense, can really make you feel like the transient, temporary being that we all are. Living in L.A. doesn’t help the illusion that we are going to be around forever too, so I think this process is likely part of a needed wake-up call.

Also, how it has made me totally obsessed with my husband. I know (from reading too much online) that he’s supposed to be getting on my nerves because of the hormones, but I have never loved him more. That’s the BEST.

Marla: Ummm okay, that’s the most ridiculously adorable answer ever! I love that and now I love your husband! You are going to love him even more when you see him rocking your little one at 3 a.m. while you “sleep” with one eye open. It’s pretty amazing how you can fall in love all over again with someone you have been with for so many years.

What has been your pregnancy “must have” thus far? For me it was my trusty pregnancy pillow that literally saved me every single night!

Rachael: Oh man, I have to get one of those! Thanks for the tip, sleeping just started to get rocky.

I would say that my favorite pregnancy item/accessory involved is the pants. Maternity pants are where it’s at. All other pants have been conspiring to waste my time for the last 33 years.

Marla: I couldn’t agree more. Once those bad boys came into my life, it took months to break up with them. Why don’t all jeans have a stretchy waistband anyway? Is there a favorite brand that you’ve been wearing?

Rachael: My faves are the Jessica Simpson for Motherhood brand that Pea in the Pod sells. People actually ask if they are maternity or not.

Bathing beauty – Marla Sokoloff

Marla: What part of motherhood are you most looking forward to?

Rachael: Marla, I have very short-term goals in this area! I will be very impressed with myself if I can just get this kid here into the outside world safely. I don’t feel qualified to pull this whole thing off, if I’m being honest. So it’s a cliché but I have to say it, just having a healthy kid is all I want.

Marla: Not cliché at all — and you are most certainly qualified! Are you finding out the sex or keeping it a surprise?

Rachael: We did find out the sex. We didn’t plan to initially but my husband and I have largely been apart for this thing, which was very difficult on several levels, so finding out the sex felt like a good way to make it all seem more real. I’m glad we did.

That said, we’re keeping it to friends and ourselves for now. I don’t know why. Oh yeah, because I’m a paranoid weirdo.

Marla: Fair enough. Will the baby’s name be North?

Rachael: Ha! Yes. No really, I respect that they went for a unique name, that takes guts. The same props go to you; Elliotte is such a beautiful name. Okay, I’ll stop comparing you to Kimye now.

Marla: No, compare away! I really see the similarities between us as well. In all honesty, if you want some unsolicited advice on the name front, I would say different and unique is definitely the way to go — but be prepared for the harsh criticism.

I just loved her name so much I didn’t think so many people would hate it! People don’t shy away from telling me just how much they hate it which always bums me out a bit. That being said, if I had to do it all over again, her name would still be Elliotte. Thank you for the compliment — glad you also like it!

Anything you want to ask me? I’ve been a mom for an entire 18 months now, so I’ve really got this Mom thing down. (Translation: I HAVE NO CLUE WHAT I’M DOING.)

Rachael: Ha! So silly, you’re doing great. I can tell by the fact that you have the time to do this column. And regarding questions … YES!

1. Do I really need to go on a hospital tour? I’ve heard it’s not really necessary. Ditto birthing class. I am more of the, “Just give me the drugs and let’s do this” school.

Marla: Great question. We took a hospital tour — I liked the idea of seeing the room beforehand. Somehow it made it less stressful to know where to check in while I wasn’t hyperventilating and writhing in pain. (Don’t worry, that won’t happen to you. Your birth will be pain-free!)

I totally dropped the ball on the birthing class! I don’t think it’s a bad idea to be honest, but by the time I got around to calling, the classes were full and my little girl was coming within weeks so I just improvised if you will.

Rachael: I am signed up to do a newborn care class, lactation coaching and baby CPR, but is there anything else I’m forgetting?

Marla: Good call on ALL of those classes! I would have been useless without the newborn preparation class. I think that covers it! Keep that lactation coach’s card handy because you will most likely need a refresher course once the real subject has arrived. Elliotte and I had our struggles in that department and our coach was everything to us.

Ready for take-off – Marla Sokoloff

Rachael: Did you use a doula? Everyone says they are the best, but I am worried about it starting to get crowded. Plus, who wants a stranger in the room?

Marla: We didn’t use a doula. I really wanted it to just be my husband and me in the room, but that is a personal preference. Obviously if you were choosing to go without an epidural I would say you should have someone there besides your husband, just in case you cause him physical harm.

Rachael: So great chatting with you Marla and I can’t wait to meet your little girl in person! I can’t wait to make our kids watch The Baby-Sitters Club with us someday and try to make them understand that we were young once, too.

Marla: Totally! So great catching up with you Rachael. I look forward to hearing the big announcement!! If you need anything in the meantime or need me to come swaddle in the middle of the night, do not hesitate to give me a shout.

You can find Rachael on Twitter @RachaelLCook. And as always, Tweet me @MarlaSok.

Until next time,

– Marla Sokoloff

More from Marla’s PEOPLE.com blog series:

• Marla Sokoloff’s Blog: No … I Really Mean It
• Marla Sokoloff’s Blog: Elliotte Anne’s Numero Uno … and Baby No. 2?
• Marla Sokoloff’s Blog: Adventures in Baby Traveling

Celebrity blogger Jenna von Oy is a new mama!

Best known for her roles as Six on Blossom and Stevie on The Parkers, von Oy is also a musician who has released two albums and is set to publish a book, The Betweeners.

von Oy, 36, wed Brad Bratcher on Oct. 10, 2010, and resides in Nashville with her husband and five dogs.

They welcomed their first child, daughter Gray Audrey, in May 2012. She is now 16 months old.

You can find her on Facebook and Twitter @JennavonOy, as well as posting on her weekly blog, The Cradle Chronicles.

In her latest blog, von Oy is feeling frustrated and writes a letter to a teen who recently judged her parenting techniques.

With Gray – The Cradle Chronicles

I typically try to make my posts light-hearted and comical, but this month I’m offering you a brief look into a side of my emotional spectrum I don’t often share: pure frustration.

Don’t worry, I’m not going to completely upend the sane structure of our happy-go-lucky blogging relationship; we’ve got a good thing going here. But we all get bothered, flustered, disillusioned, or disappointed from time to time (in varying degrees), and it would be dishonest of me to pretend I’m any different.

Contrary to popular belief, being an actor doesn’t deplete you of your human qualities! (In most cases, anyway … I hope.) It always makes me wary when someone tries to convince me he or she has led a life of unconditional cheer and contentment. I mean, I’m a huge fan of maintaining a positive outlook during stormy weather. But never getting mad? That’s just a categorical impossibility!

Sometimes it’s nice to hear folks admit they aren’t perpetually at peace, or that they don’t smile every second of the day — you know, since we are all mere mortals and, consequently, have our moments.

There are minor annoyances that pepper our everyday lives: one of our kids dumps Goldfish on the kitchen floor immediately after we’ve finished mopping (for the third time), the dog chews our favorite shoe to bits (wouldn’t it be great if you could retaliate by wearing his favorite bone in its place?), we accidentally douse our iPhone with hot coffee (a catch-22, since you need the coffee to function, but can’t always function while drinking it), or we forget to pack underwear on a family vacation (thank God bikini bottoms can double as panties in a pinch!).

I’ve dealt with all of those scenarios first-hand, and my response ranged from a smirk to mild irritation. $#!? happens, right?

I wouldn’t say I’m terribly quick-tempered by nature. My phases of anger are generally a slow burn, often beginning with a small sigh and a bit of teeth gritting (which I’m not terribly adept at hiding).

Obviously, there are intensified levels of agitation that can potentially follow, but I try to appropriately reign everything in and keep it in check, whenever humanly possible — this is especially true when I’m in front of my daughter.

That said, lately I’m finding there’s a deeper sense of frustration that stems from motherhood. It is my instinctual reaction to someone’s ignorance and/or blatant criticism of my parenting. Warranted or not, no mother likes to hear someone pass judgment on the thing she works hardest at.

And these days, I would be hard-pressed to find something I work harder at than taking care of, teaching, and loving my child. Which is, in my opinion, as it should be. No one ever said parenting was supposed to be easy … And sometimes it isn’t!

Generally speaking, I’m all for letting off steam in small doses. If you can express yourself in a constructive way that doesn’t hurt anyone mentally, verbally, or physically, it can help to prevent more extreme outbursts.

(And, perhaps, the sort of crazy antics that exile certain young Hollywood ingénues to the cover of tabloids. I won’t mention any names here, as I imagine you are perfectly capable of filling in the blanks all on your own.)

My growing girl – The Cradle Chronicles

We all have our little tricks to calming the savage beast within, and I’m sure many of us labor over that task weekly, whether at work or at home. It’s part of the reason I like to write, in fact. Sometimes paper makes a better punching bag than anything I could possibly find at a boxing gym. And it tends to be safer when you’re clumsy like me.

So, with that in mind, here’s a letter I penned recently, following an incident that made my blood boil …

Dear Opinion-offering Teenager at the local-bulk-warehouse-I’ll-refrain-from-mentioning-by-name,

I want to thank you for standing in judgment of my parenting skills today, since you clearly know so much about what it must be like to have a young child.

When I made the decision to clean my daughter’s fallen pacifier with my own mouth before handing it back to her (you know, since I didn’t have an anti-bacterial wipe handy, and don’t carry around boiling water in my back pocket), it was because I knew the nipple hadn’t actually touched the floor.

Truth be told, I’m also not much of a germaphobe these days, since I spend an inordinate amount of time changing diapers and managing wayward baby boogers. I also happen to be privy to the abundant exchange of slobber-laden toys and/or equipment at most daycares and park jungle gyms.

Despite your obvious disgust (or whether or not you agree with the practice), it should also be noted that recent studies even show it’s healthier for a child’s immune system when a parent licks a dirty pacifier before giving it back (check out this link to the Official Journal of the American Academy of Pediatrics, if you’re curious…).

I know it sounds wacky, but saliva doesn’t always have to be our enemy! More importantly, part of parenting entails the willingness to make sacrifices for your child’s well-being, and everyone has their own level of comfort on that one. If you don’t believe me, ask your own mom about it; I imagine she has something eye-opening to say!

Not to mention — and this may come as a horrible shock to you — but that shopping cart you’ve been pushing around is a veritable petri dish of bacteria. Consequently, on your next visit, you may want to refrain from picking your teeth after tasting the samples. I’m just saying. Nonetheless, thank you for reminding me that, since we are all such models of perfection, we should feel free to provide a running commentary about everyone else’s methods, lifestyle, capabilities, and decisions.

For instance, I’m glad to see your own mother did such a sound job of teaching you to be non-judgmental and courteous with your evaluations. I know, I know, freedom of speech and all… but can’t we all be a little nicer with it?

I rest my case.

Actually, on second thought, I don’t.

Now, I know I probably sound a bit more acerbic than I need to be here, but that’s because I enjoy a little sarcasm from time to time. And, you know, because you royally pissed me off. But, believe it or not, I actually owe you some gratitude. I don’t say that to be sardonic; I honestly mean it. You’ve encouraged me to smile at fellow parents who look tired and frazzled in the Target checkout line, or who are clearly trying their best to quiet a screaming baby on an airplane flight.

I am reminded why it’s important not to judge the father of the little boy who is wearing two different shoes to school, the pregnant woman sipping a cup of coffee that may or may not be decaffeinated, or the mom who forgot to bake brownies for the class fundraiser. Parenting is not an exact science. In fact, it isn’t a science at all. It’s one part determination, two parts chaos, a heaping ton of patience and zen, and an immeasurable amount of love.

I don’t expect you to understand that notion at your young age, but someday you will. Someday, you’ll hear the disdainful tone of a stranger as you wipe your son’s snotty nose with your shirtsleeve because nothing else is readily available. Or the callous stares you receive when your child yells out, “Daddy, don’t tell me to shut up!” in the middle of a peaceful church service. Someday you’ll realize we’re all just doing our best to help our kids grow up to be healthy, happy, smart, independent, considerate, kind, and loved. And we are all learning as we go, so we aren’t infallible.

It seems you still have quite a bit of learning to go yourself, as do I, so I forgive you. I forgive the sanctimonious sneer, the self-righteous indignation, and the loud exclamation of condescension so everyone within earshot could hear it. I understand that your criticism was made out of a lack of experience … experience that, I imagine, karma shall eventually bestow upon you. When that happens, I hope you’ll brush the dust off of this letter, and know there’s someone out there praying for you during your learning curve, despite your prior transgressions. Because you’ve reminded me that we parents need prayers and praise — not payback, or pity, or criticism, or spite.

One day I hope your spirit will be in a place of parental understanding and mutual respect. Until then, I hope you can find it in your heart to offer kind words in lieu of your rude and nasty ones. And if you can’t, I hope you choose to say nothing at all next time.

Sincerely,

A fellow patron at the local-bulk-warehouse-I’ll-refrain-from-mentioning-by-name, who parents to the best of her abilities … whether you like them or not.

P.S. Those dark Ray-Ban sunglasses you were wearing indoors may have been a stellar fashion touch, but they may also have been skewing your perception of reality. Next time try the rose-colored ones. They present a much more forgiving view.

Being silly together – The Cradle Chronicles

So … I admit I wrote the above letter immediately following said incident, while I was really upset. It sort of served as an exercise in catharsis-through-thought-purging, I suppose, and it worked like a charm! Instead of spitting fire, tripping the kid on his way out, or spouting profanities at him until I was blue in the face, I returned home, grabbed a pen, and quietly expressed my rage in a slightly less brawl-provoking manner. (And that kid is probably none-the-wiser, since I’ll never be giving him the letter!)

In all honesty, I wasn’t going to publish the note/lecture because I worried that too many of you wouldn’t see my side on it, and would jump down my throat. Again, no mommy likes to have her parenting “techniques” criticized.

But then it dawned on me: if you did that, you’d be missing my point here, which is to refrain from judgment, right? So I decided to put it all out there, without holding back.

You may disagree with my methods, and that’s fine; I accept that we may just have to agree to disagree on that matter. If that’s the case, I respect that we have differing stances, and I hope you do too. I hope you understand the spirit of the letter regardless.

In a nutshell, it is about not sitting in judgment of one another. The point isn’t whether or not you feel I should have licked the pacifier and given it back to my daughter — I am sure the thought of that is normal to some of you, and gross to others.

But I’m challenging all of us (myself included!) to keep our snide remarks to ourselves, to pause before considering or calling another parent “inadequate” or “imperfect” and to resist the temptation to put down those who are out there doing their best — just as we are.

I can promise I have tactics you oppose, and I imagine the reverse is true as well. That’s just how the cookie crumbles. But, as a fellow parent, I’ve got your back. And maybe, just maybe, you’ve got mine too.

Until next time,

– Jenna von Oy

More from Jenna’s PEOPLE.com blog series:

• Jenna von Oy’s Blog: Embracing the ‘Back to School’ Spirit
• Jenna von Oy’s Blog: Mom’s the Word
• Jenna von Oy’s Blog: Having Our Cake (and Eating It, Too)

DuffImages.com

Please welcome Michelle Stafford to our celebrity bloggers series.

The two-time Emmy Award-winning actress is best known as Phyllis on The Young and the Restless, a role she played for 15 years.

Now mom to daughter Natalia Scout Lee, 3½, Stafford blogs on everything from body and style to decor and men on her “Doing It as a Single Chick” website.

She is currently the co-creator, co-writer and star of The Stafford Project, a web series that debuted in August. As a tongue-in-cheek depiction of Stafford’s life, the series has been called “terrific and audacious” by TV Guide.

The show can be viewed on her website and on YouTube. Additionally, Stafford, 48, can be found on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

Ya know, I’ve sat down a few times to write this blog, but being a single parent … I’ve been interrupted. “Mommy, I have to go pee pees” or “Mommy, play with me in my room!” or “Can you make me a hot dog, Mommy?” And actually, at this very moment, I am juggling between playing in the pretend kitchen with my daughter and writing this for you.

A little over six years ago I decided to adopt a child. It didn’t go so smoothly for me, so I then decided to just do it myself. I mean how hard could it be to get pregnant? Three IVF attempts and three surgeries later, my body was spent. I was exhausted. And by that point, my personality sucked.

Finally, after what I call a “three and a half year journey through hell,” I welcomed my amazing, healthy, biological daughter into the world via surrogate! How lucky was I that she was beautiful, calm and healthy? But unbeknownst to me, the real work was about to begin.

I had no idea how challenging being a single parent would be. A child was something I had wanted so desperately for so long. (Just an aside here, but I really missed the boat on those “How to trap a man by getting pregnant” classes. Where was I when those were being taught? Of course I say that in jest, because we all know that no woman really does that, right? I digress…)

I was single and 40 and wanted to be a mother. Why did I have to wait? I knew I would be a good parent, I wanted to be responsible for another person, I wanted to make a real difference in someone’s life, and I wanted to have that “special love” for a child that I had always heard parents talk about.

I’ll be honest: It’s challenging doing it alone. Honestly, the first year practically all I remember is my distain for carrying that car seat around! It would have been nice to have a man to do that, but what the hell, my left arm is really toned now.

I would work on my show for very long hours during the day and then come home to my daughter. Was up most of the night just to have to wake up again at 5 a.m. to do it all over. Honestly though, it was bliss. It’s still bliss. The challenges are even bliss. I had wanted to be a mother for so long, but was told by many that it would never happen. Any challenge I go through as a single parent is nothing compared to the hell it took to get here.

My daughter is my best friend. My buddy. We are a team! It’s very special being a single parent. There are many out there, and as single parents, we have all the responsibility. We get all the tears, but also all the hugs! I have nothing but respect for all of those who are parenting alone. You are actually phenomenal humans and should be acknowledged as such. So, I’m giving you a shout-out here! So — even if you’re a guy — keep on “doing it as a single chick”!

Ray Kachatorian

– Michelle Stafford

Courtesy Elisabeth Rohm

Elisabeth Röhm, best known for her roles as Serena on Law & Order and Kate on Angel, has been blogging for PEOPLE.com for over two years now.

The actress, 40, currently plays Taylor on The Client List, and will next star as Dolly in David O. Russell’s latest film, American Hustle, to be released Christmas Day.

Her book, Baby Steps: Having the Child I Always Wanted (Just Not As I Expected), was released in April.

She can be found on Facebook, Google + and on Twitter @ElisabethRohm.

In her latest blog, Röhm — mom to 5-year-old Easton August with fiancé Ron Anthony — writes about recognizing when another mom is having a tough time — and helping her out.

You know the look you had on your face this morning as you woke up? That beautiful, focused and yet somewhat frazzled look that suggests you’d be lucky if you could get a comb through your hair as you manage your way through the routine before school time?

You make breakfast, straighten the bed, throw the dishes in the sink (you’ll do them later), get all the troops washed, brushed, flossed, dressed and out the door to your car to begin your commute to the daily drop-off, where you will then try to get to work yourself. (Lucky if you’re on time, ’cause traffic can be a you-know-what). Just a day in the life of parenthood, especially if you’re doing it solo, or as in our case, Daddy’s already gone to work by the time this ritual takes place.

It’s a look I feel creep over my face as I try to gracefully juggle all that’s expected of me. A look that I see on my friend’s faces as they sigh with the relief of having a fellow mom they can show the cracks in their veneer to.

I see it as I watch women in high heels and suits make their way through the grocery store with their little ones climbing all over their shopping carts like monkeys after a long day at work … after which you’ll still need to make dinner, clean the kitchen for the new day ahead, run the bath, throw a load in for clean clothes come morning, and then bed with books, giggles and talks about the day. Not to mention you may even still have work to do after they hit the sack.

You know the look, right? You might even have it spreading across your face right now as you try to manage it all, ladies.

It’s a look that I recognize, and this morning after drop-off I saw it on the face of a young mom who was waiting for the bus with her toddler. I’m not one to try to save the world. It was just a look that touched my heart while I too talked on a conference call and thought about all I had to get done before 3 p.m. It was hard to miss her neck craning to see if she could catch a glimpse of the bus that was going to take her someplace that seemed urgent and important on a weekday morning.

I could relate as I had a pile of calls to return, scripts to read, projects that needed my attention and a house to clean all before I’d make the trek back to Easton’s school for pick-up. Mind you, pick-up is a time of day that I anticipate with joy; however it’s a race for all moms to cram into those few fateful hours all that needs to be done professionally or personally so that we are the best and most sane moms possible.

Now let me start by saying I’m from N.Y.C. I’m street-smart. I grew up knowing not to talk to strangers and mind you, strangers are a part of your daily, hourly, minute-to-minute experience in city life. I know how to watch my back. Not to mention being a city kid makes you savvy. Generally speaking, I’ve got good instincts That’s all to say that I don’t make a habit of picking up strangers off the street and carting them to God knows where, and I certainly don’t propagate being unsafe, especially when you’re someone’s mama.

But as my car slowed down in front of the bus stop due to a firetruck passing, I couldn’t help but notice the look on this mom’s face. It was the look I’d had on mine all morning as I’d tried to do, over-do and be all things to all people, especially my sweet Easton. The child was clean and cared for and seated on the bench while the mom was surveying the landscape. Like her, I was in work/race mode to get everything done that was on my to-do list before school would let out and we’d be on our way to swimming, where all work would come to screeching halt.

I couldn’t help but notice myself in her and all of my friends. In my neighbor this morning who was daring to get some exercise in before she would head to the office, only to return home at 5 p.m. to a whirlwind house where being a mom who does it all is only celebrated once a year and noticed if you have a meltdown from stress and exhaustion. “Mommy needs a break.” Come on, you know it’s true. Look, I’m no Mother Teresa and can count on one hand the times I’ve picked up a stranger to help. But I stopped.

“Hi. You guys okay? Where are you going?” I asked. If had been far I’d probably have said no, but her destination was 20 minutes and just so happened to be a local college. So now add to that mix of work, home, kids, survival — the additional pursuit of education and the chaos of public transportation. OY! I think you ladies know where the story goes from here.

I casually said, “If you feel comfortable, I can drop you off. It’s easier than the bus. I’m a mom. I get it.” Jasmine put her 3-year-old son in the back of my car with the booster seat she was carrying, along with both of their school bags and piled in. I’m guessing they felt safer because my backseat was littered with toys.

Her son quickly befriended Easton’s Minnie Mouse as she told me how she had just gotten back from serving in active duty and was in her second semester of college. Jasmine’s goal is to be a surgeon. I’m so grateful for my education that I couldn’t help but be moved by her story of serving this nation, giving birth in Germany and then taking her military pay and putting it towards school so that she and her boy could have a good life and all the necessities.

Like I said, I don’t recommend this to you. The world can be a crazy place. We all know that. But in that moment, I trusted my instincts as a fellow mom and found I’d made one mother’s life a little bit easier. With a test that day, she got to school an hour earlier than planned. I could relate to the quest for a better life and to fulfill her potential not just for herself, but also for her child. I think we all feel that way. We talked about the importance of education and reinvention.

Anyway, as I was driving with Jasmine, I thought about how important it is that we come together more as a community of women and serve and support each other. That we take the time to notice each other and read the looks and feelings that are all too familiar for us parents who are trying to juggle all that we do. That we lend a hand to each other and continue to build a community amongst our friends, schools, neighbors and yes, even strangers.

It never hurts to recognize another parent and give them a knowing smile or a word of encouragement. Isn’t it really that simple? Don’t we all just need a little compassion and support — to be heard?

As I was blocks away from Jasmine’s college, we too were talking about the courage and energy it takes to continue investing in ourselves, the commitment to our kids that comes so easily being an invaluable lesson about self-love.

I may have given her a ride, which to an outsider could seem crazy. In the end, we both gave each other a little relief in sharing our mom dialogue and all it takes to get through a weekday morning. Women and community — two words that we created and sustain every day of our lives.

Until next time, Mom/Mama/Mommy. You rock.

– Elisabeth Röhm

P.S. As you probably all know, the American Red Cross is very close to my heart. I’ve been working with them for 10 years and am always looking for ways to help support their mission. If you feel like I do, Therafit is a great company that is donating funds to them. You can buy their amazing RED shoe called “The Deborah” and they will donate $20 from each sale to the American Red Cross. What could be better than shopping for a cause?!

More from Elisabeth’s PEOPLE.com blog series:

• Elisabeth Rohm’s Blog: Are Your Kids Zinging Yet?
• Elisabeth Rohm’s Blog: Locked Down in Boston with Easton
• Elisabeth Rohm’s Blog: My Visit to St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital

BABAK

After her hilarious first blog, we just had to welcome back Lauren Holly for a second installment!

Best known for her roles in Dumb and Dumber and on NCIS and Picket Fences, the actress, 49, is currently starring on ABC’s Motive.

In addition to her acting career, Holly is also mom to sons Azer, 11, George, 10, and Henry, 9, with husband Francis Greco.

She can be found on Facebook and Twitter @LaurenHolly.

In her blog, Holly recounts the mystery of the disappearing soda and fears she is raising a liar when none of her boys confess.

Honesty. We all want our kids to be/have it. How do we teach it? It is at the core of being a good person. Adults all know this. Ask any person over the age of 35, and they can tell you that the best people in their lives are honest ones. It’s a quality that always seems to be accompanied by others as equally positive traits.

Bear with me in the labeling of “adult” as anyone over 35 — every 17-year-old reading this probably moaned loudly at that one. (So close! But I’ll be even able to vote!)

These days, maturity seems to come more slowly. Personally, I blame it on all the societal coddling. We are raising kids who have no idea how it is to lose, as “everyone is a winner!” That really bugs me.

Some of my biggest leaps of growth came after stinging defeats. I think it somehow makes kids feel more entitled, less ambitious, less respect for a work ethic. Therefore, it takes longer to build a wealth of life experience — and those riches in one’s possession are how I measure being an adult.

Anyway, dealing with an honest person along the way is always pleasurable. They are our heroes, and ultimately, are whom we always want to win.

As a mom, I want my boys to be members of this elite group. I want them to be men that people look to with respect. It was the missing soda that made me think I might not be teaching it.

There was a crazy night of movie fun and junk that I approved of. I was away working over a weekend and I wanted them to have fun. After gorging themselves, there was a six-pack of soda left. Their nanny took it to her room. She knew better than to leave it in the fridge. With three preteen boys? Gone before lunch.

Maybe I’m overreacting, but I have a pretty hard time with my kids drinking the stuff — for so many reasons.

She told them to keep away from it. Every day after, one soda disappeared. The first day she thought maybe she had made a mistake. The second day she knew someone was taking it. She asked each of them in private. All said no, it was not them.

I came home on the third day a soda was missing. She still did not know who was the thief. At dinner that night, I asked all of them to confess if guilty. No one did. I took each in private. All claimed and professed innocence. Even worse, I believed them. So did their nanny.

Usually I could spot the signs — unique to each of them — of lying. This time I couldn’t. I was so distressed. Who had learned to lie so well that they fooled their mother? What would become of him?

Now, I don’t think my reaction was exaggerated. A liar at this age had a greater likelihood of going down the wrong path. You are, really, who you are hanging around with. Who would be friends with a liar? Sketchy types, for sure. If they were this good at it, they must have been practicing. What else did I not know?

I began to question my methods.

BY EXAMPLE: Huh. Not so good. They’ve heard the story I even shared with you all before — wrecking the one side of my parents’ Plymouth Valiant because of driving hijinks and not telling them until years later.

I’m an actress. I am dramatic. A certain flair (of exaggeration) is expected. I pride myself on storytelling. Did it really matter if I was playing a character? Kids do what they see.

Or, did they notice when what I said maybe wasn’t the complete truth? Was it understood when I only was trying to spare someone’s feelings? Could they separate the nuance from the core of truth I was trying to teach?

BY REWARD: Surely I told them enough the premium I put on telling the truth. Punishments were not as severe if one came clean. No matter how bad it was, I promised to make the consequence not as bad if they suddenly told me the truth.

Okay, so what then would happen to them for lying?

Oh.

BY CONSEQUENCE: The rule was if you lie, you were in the biggest trouble of all. Wow. Looking at it now seems like I was just creating the super liar. Anything would be said and stuck to not to get caught.

You get my point. I was spinning out, trying to figure out how it came to be that I had raised a stealthy soda stealer. That one of my beloved angels was probably gonna end up in jail because I wasn’t teaching them, well, to be honest. It was going to be a sleepless night.

Then it occurred to me. Yes, I had dented my parents’ car, but I had worked like the devil to fix it quick. I repaired the gardens and mailboxes I hit. Were my parents really harmed for not knowing at the time? Not really. Was I spared from any difficulty in leading my life? Most definitely. Even though I was guilty of that subterfuge, did I know the difference between right and wrong? Yes.

Would I lie to the detriment of another? Would I break the law? Lie for my personal monetary gain? No. No. No.

So, maybe there is a bright spot in this current dilemma. It could be that all my hopes of respectability are not lost. Maybe my example of basic goodness is enough? That the flaws in my lessons are small enough to not hide the jist?

Maybe it is still reasonable that my boys will still grow into being good men. I guess the stealer of soda was spared some indignity, some embarrassment from my wrath.

They all brushed their teeth. I’m betting no soda ever goes missing again — maybe that is enough.

Still, a lie was told. We should talk about trust.

Me and my husband! Courtesy Paula Garces

Thanks for welcoming our new celebrity blogger, Paula Garces!

Widely known for her role in the Harold & Kumar franchise, the actress currently stars in Lifetime’s new hit show, Devious Maids, as well as All My Children and Warehouse 13.

In addition to acting, Garces, 39, is the mastermind behind the first Latina superhero video game, Aluna.

Already mom to daughter Skye, 21, Garces is currently expecting another baby — a son!– with husband Antonio Hernandez in November.

You can find her on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter @paulagarces1.

Welcome to my second baby blog!

A lot has happened in a month. Where do I begin?

Well, if I’m being honest — as difficult as this is for me to admit — I am experiencing the baby bump blues!! I have everything I could want: a beautiful family that loves and supports me, great friends who are so excited about my pregnancy, a career that hasn’t stopped (I’ve been working on three shows: Devious Maids, All My Children and Warehouse 13) and I’ve been writing a children’s book Jose & Coqui throughout my entire pregnancy. I should be so grateful!

So why do I feel so blue? And do I even have a right to feel this way?

After four years of trying to have a baby and two miscarriages, I finally have this beautiful gift inside me and everyone around me seems to be so happy — they can’t wait to meet the little guy!

At my beautiful baby shower Courtesy Paula Garces

But lately all I can think about is how nauseated I still am, how much heartburn I’m living with and how my hands and feet have been swelling up like crazy. The biggest blow to my ego is the fact that I’m not one of the super pregnant women that you see in magazines: the ones that do Pilates and yoga and all kinds of exercises to maintain their figure and normal weight gain.

I’m just getting to be eight months pregnant and I have already gained over 50 pounds!!!

In the last month, I have been feeling very lethargic, a lot of back pain and my hips hurt so much that I waddle when I walk. I really haven’t had the energy to get out of bed and even wash my hair some days, let alone go workout.

When I’m not pregnant I’m a very active person. I guess I’m feeling like I’m losing my old self. I mean, my daughter is 21 years old — what am I doing having another baby?

Not only are the physical changes that are happening to my body getting to me, but these thoughts that are running through my head are really starting to bother me and worry me. Thank God I decided to communicate these feelings to my closest friends and family.

My daughter Skye and Antonio Courtesy Paula Garces

My bestie Stacey M., my daughter Skye and my sister Vanessa decided that what I really needed most was to get back to celebrating the most amazing thing that was happening to me: this growing baby boy inside of me. And to give my family and friends the opportunity to celebrate me, love me and spoil me in a very big way.

The coolest, biggest baby shower was the answer! I didn’t mean to sound ungrateful, but at the time a big party with everyone fussing over me was the last thing that I wanted. Thank God they did not listen to me!

Since I was no help, Stacey, Vanessa and Skye decided to recruit the BEST event planner ever Michael Russo. I must say Michael did his thing!!!

Plenty of pretty flowers Courtesy Paula Garces

The venue, Harbor Club at Prime in Huntington, New York was GORGEOUS. Not only was the place beautiful, but the food was so yummy, my guests are still raving about everything. The flowers by Pedestals Floral were right out of a fairytale dream.

Stacey contacted Lolly Clothing and they sent over a royal blue long dress that was so comfy and hugged me in all the right places, especially my baby bump. A necklace by Alma Mei had enough sparkle to make me feel like a princess.

My hubby hired a Cuban band called Trio Mas y Mas that played like angels and even made me shake my booty! Tony had them dedicate one of our favorite songs to me, “Love Song” by The Cure.

I got so inspired and so happy by the music and his dedication that I decided to do a dedication of my own to my daughter Skye. I quickly asked my close friend Adrienne Bailon to sing a song by the late Selena called “Como la Flor” to her. Adrienne rocked it — gracias amiga!!!

After that we all enjoyed Latin-flavored (guava, tres leches, flan and coquito) cupcakes by Brooklyn Cupcake for dessert. So yummy.

Adrienne Bailon and event planner Michael Russo Courtesy Paula Garces

My guests received goody bags filled with my comic book Aluna to remind me I still am super, foot rub and lip balm by Erbaviva to soothe my aching feet and chapped lips, a belly and face moisturizer by Novena Maternity and T-shirts by Alma Mei.

I even got a bassinet by Elm Baby‘s Culla-Belly that got me so excited about sleeping with my newborn in a safe way … I can’t wait!!!

My daughter Skye, my hubby Antonio, my sister Vanessa, my bestie Stacey, my friend/event planner Michael Russo and the rest of my family and friends: THANK YOU so much for reminding me that this is a special time that should be celebrated and remembered in a big way. The baby shower was beautiful and I am so lucky to not only have all of you, but this beautiful baby boy inside me!

I still get the baby bump blues every now and then, but now all I have to do is look back at the pics and videos from the baby shower and it never fails. It always makes me laugh, feel better and feel excited about my baby boy Antonio.

Group shot Courtesy Paula Garces

‘Til the next blog …

Besos,

– Paula Garces

More from Paula’s PEOPLE.com blog series:

• Paula Garces’s Blog: Meet Me and My Family!

Please give a warm welcome to our newest celebrity blogger, Amanda Beard!

The seven-time Olympic medalist first appeared on the sports scene at the 1996 Atlanta games, walking away with her first gold for the medley relay and two silvers for the 100 and 200-meter breaststrokes — all at the age of 14.

Since then, the competitive swimmer scored a bronze medal at the 2000 Sydney Olympics, and her first individual gold medal along with two silvers at the 2004 Athens games.

Beard, who is sponsored by Aqua Sphere, recently penned her memoir, In the Water They Can’t See You Cry.

She and her husband Sacha Brown married in May 2009 and are the proud parents of son Blaise Ray, 4, and daughter Doone Isla, 4 months.

Beard can be found online on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter @AmandaRayBeard.

Courtesy Amanda Beard

Hey PEOPLE & friends!

I’m Amanda Beard, and I’m excited to be writing alongside all of the other incredible women on People Moms & Babies. We’re all different in our pursuits — acting, singing, modeling, swimming — yet united by one of the best gifts of all: motherhood!

Many people know me as the shy 14-year-old clutching my teddy bear at the ’96 Olympics, and have watched me through the years as I competed in three other Olympic Games; others know me through my sponsors like Aqua Sphere.

Nowadays, away from the pool, I’m a soccer mom who spends a lot of time on the floor playing Legos with my son and husband. My newest title is mom-of-two, as we recently welcomed our beautiful baby girl, Doone, in June.

Between preschool, play dates and getting back in the pool to train for Rio 2016, life is a bit hectic — but wonderful nonetheless — and I’m excited to introduce you to my favorite people: the ones who know me as “Honey” and “Mommy.”

Courtesy Amanda Beard

Doone, our smiley little girl: Doone, my 4-month-old, is the happiest baby I’ve ever met. She always has a big smile on her face in the morning, and is thoroughly amused by everything her big brother, Blaise, does.

I heard through the grapevine that our PEOPLE.com readers loved Doone’s name when we announced her birth back in June, and wondered how my husband Sacha and I came up with it. Well, I wish we had an amazing story but, the fact is, we just thought it was a beautiful and unique name. When I looked at her for the first time, she looked like my little Doone.

Courtesy Amanda Beard

Blaise, our resident superhero: Blaise is my smart, silly and sensitive 4-year-old. He is truly a cross between Sacha and I: loving sports and art. Blaise is our budding athlete (I’m his soccer coach this year!), is obsessed with superheroes, and is an amazing helper (which makes him a superhero in our eyes). Oh, and before Doone was born, Blaise referred to her as “my baby,” which we thought was hysterical.

Courtesy Amanda Beard

Sacha, the artistic one, and my partner in crime: Sacha and I have been married for four years — and he’s my better half! I admire the passion he has for his job as a photographer, and his love for fine art, videography and travel. In fact, he travels the U.S. on his motorcycle taking pictures and going on off-roading adventures (when he’s not on daddy duty). He also enjoys fishing, and is currently teaching Blaise the ropes (or the rod, I suppose!).

Over the coming months, I can’t wait to share more about our life as a family of four (so far, so good!), and how Blaise and Doone are coming into their relationship as brother and sister.

I’ll also be taking you on the journey with me as I work to get back in pre-baby shape while training for another Olympic Games — this time, as a mom of two.

Courtesy Amanda Beard

Take care until next time!

– Amanda Beard

Celebrity blogger Jenna von Oy is a new mama!

Best known for her roles as Six on Blossom and Stevie on The Parkers, von Oy is also a musician who has released two albums and is set to publish a book, The Betweeners.

von Oy, 36, wed Brad Bratcher on Oct. 10, 2010, and resides in Nashville with her husband and five dogs.

They welcomed their first child, daughter Gray Audrey, in May 2012. She is now 17 months old.

You can find her on Facebook and Twitter @JennavonOy, as well as posting on her weekly blog, The Cradle Chronicles.

In her latest blog, von Oy explains what makes fall particularly special for her trio.

Mimosa Arts Photography

I know we are already making our way into November, but it’s October that still has me beguiled. October ignites the changing of seasons. It is the ushering in of cool days and crisp evenings, a magical time when the foliage cloaks itself in various shades of fire.

It is a season which begs for the retrieval of cozy sweaters from the attic, making hand-dipped caramel apples, picking gourds at the local farmer’s market, sipping hot coffee on the front porch while gazing out at a foggy morning, and smelling the scent of hickory smoke from a neighbor’s wood burning stove.

It prompts the scramble to find recipes for toasted pumpkin seeds, and pumpkin lattes, and pumpkin pies, and … well, pumpkin everything. (Is it my imagination, or has the pumpkin spice flavor fad taken over this season? Next up: pumpkin spice-scented toothpaste and toilet paper. God forbid.)

I eagerly beckon in the fall; it is my favorite season. The thought of it conjures stunning images of my childhood: the East Coast autumnal landscape, Halloween costume plotting, and swinging into colossal piles of raked leaves with my siblings. October is an enchanting, poetic time of year that has always inspired my heart. And it began doing so on a whole new level when my husband and I chose 10-10-10 to say, “I do.”

These days, October represents the resurrection of memories from our wedding day. It means opening up our treasured, leather-bound album, and reminiscing. It is a time to reflect on that beautiful afternoon when our closest family and friends gathered together at a bed and breakfast in Connecticut, to show their profound support and adoration for the love my husband and I share.

It is celebrating that love all over again every October 10th, and bursting with gratitude for the blessings that have been bestowed upon us since then.

Yes, the month of October has taken on a life of its own. When Brad and I exchanged our heartfelt, self-written vows three years ago, we began a journey of love and learning that has lead to moments of joy, triumph, comedy, exhilaration and even frustration. (After all, marriage is a constant work in progress, isn’t it? I’m a firm believer that if love were easy, we wouldn’t have the same degree of appreciation for it…)

Most of all, our vows intensified the endless amount of trust, respect and affection we have for one another. And there’s proof of all of that in one phenomenal little 17-month old girl named Gray.

Waiting until my mid-thirties to get married meant I’d had plenty of time to dream of babies. Let’s just say my biological clock was ticking so loudly, I didn’t need to wear a wristwatch or set an alarm clock. But as we all know, life abides by its own set of rules and timelines, and they aren’t always in sync with our own.

When Brad and I were finally blessed with finding one another, we knew kids would follow soon after our marriage. We both (firmly and resolutely) wanted children, and we were up front about it from the get-go. In fact, I posed the “Do you want kids?” question on one of our first dates. I wasn’t messing around where that issue was concerned!

In a way, the idea of raising babies became part of what endeared us to one another. It was one more way for us to connect and share our hopes for the future. And the truth is that Brad and I were already head over heels for Gray long before she entered the picture. She was a fixture in our thoughts, even on our wedding day.

We may not have known her name, her arrival date, or whether she would be a boy or girl, but we knew she would eventually be in our lives. In our hearts, we were parents even before we had a living, breathing little girl to show for it. (Unless, of course, one takes canine babies into consideration!)

So in honor of the event that ultimately lead to my becoming a mommy — that stunningly perfect October afternoon when the skies stopped crying long enough for the sun to smile down on our wedding ceremony — I thought I’d do a blog in snapshots this month. I hope you enjoy perusing some of my favorite photos from that special day, as well as a few recent ones from this year. Viva October!

Here’s Your Sign

I love the simplicity of this photo — everything the day stood for was represented on a little wooden sign!

Brooke Boling Photography

It’s All In the Details

I’m a stickler for details, and it was very important to me to have personal touches around that made the wedding ours and ours alone. One of my favorites was my bouquet, which had old brooches of my Grandmother’s fastened onto it. Though she passed away years ago, it was neat to have that special reminder of her with me as I experienced such a beautiful milestone in my life. She would have been so proud!

Brooke Boling Photography

Them Boots Were Made For Walkin’ … Down the Aisle

There’s something I just adore about this photo of the boots I wore under my wedding gown. I love the vibrant colors and the composition of the photograph, but it’s much more than that.

I think I’m partial to the idea that this was taken before our life-changing celebration began. It’s a snapshot of a moment in time: a pair of shoes never worn before, both literally and figuratively. These boots walked me down the aisle, stood beside my husband as we took our marriage vows, and danced us to our wedding song.

Brooke Boling Photography

Our Marriage Vow Journal

Brad and I read our vows, which we wrote ourselves and kept secret from one another until the ceremony, from a little journal engraved with our initials. Along with the other profoundly emotional and sincere words we extended to one another, it happens that we both spoke of the children we couldn’t wait to have together.

Who knew we’d end up celebrating my pregnancy exactly a year later?! Gray has truly been the answer to our prayers.

Brooke Boling Photography

Just Married!

This was taken in the moment immediately following the official pronouncement that we were husband and wife, and it makes me smile every time I see it. All of our happy tears and nerves had faded into giant smiles of sheer euphoria and marriage-induced intoxication!

Brooke Boling Photography

Picture Perfect with a Pug

Before we were Gray’s parents, we were parents to Bruiser, Bailey, Mia, Boo and Ruby. Not all of the pups could attend our wedding due to logistics (not to mention the highly probable, basset hound-instigated ruckus which would have ensued), but Bruiser served as our ring bearer.

He did a fantastic job, and we had a quick photo opportunity with him before he headed home for the night. You know, since it was kind of pushing it to squeeze a Pug into a tuxedo for longer than 10 minutes in the first place.

Carla Ten Eyck Photography

Siblings In Photo Booth

Many of my favorite wedding photos consist of family and friends enjoying the festivities. From the photo booth, to the dance floor, to our amazing after-party (friends got up and sang ’til the wee hours…), there was definitely a lot of love and joy going around!

In an effort to maintain everyone’s privacy, I’ve refrained from posting any of those pictures. However, I just couldn’t resist including this one of my younger siblings Peter, Alyssa, Tyler and me hamming it up in the photo booth. I appreciate them agreeing to let me post it!

Carla Ten Eyck Photography

Dance with the One That Brought You … And Then Married You!

I’m thoroughly captivated by this photo of us captivated with each other. This was during a very special dance that I surprised my husband with during our reception. I’d written and recorded a song for him, then snuck it to our DJ. Brad has been a huge supporter of my music endeavors, so it was neat to give him such an intimate and personal gift!

Brooke Boling Photography

Under the Weather

After a week of pouring rain, the clouds parted and our wedding day was gorgeous. Just in case Murphy’s Law and the inclement weather kicked back in, we’d rented vintage parasols. Thankfully, we didn’t wind up using any of them … except as props for some really cute photos!

Brooke Boling Photography

And it all led to this beautiful, curious, wonderful, tiny human. Marriage has brought a lot of wonderful adventures to Brad and me, but none are as profound as the birth of our daughter.

This little girl has stolen our hearts, and I’m pretty sure she’ll be holding them hostage (in the best possible way, of course) forever!!

Mimosa Arts Photography

Until next time,

– Jenna von Oy

More from Jenna’s PEOPLE.com blog series:

• Jenna von Oy’s Blog: Hell Hath No Fury Like a Mommy Scorned
• Jenna von Oy’s Blog: Embracing the ‘Back to School’ Spirit
• Jenna von Oy’s Blog: Mom’s the Word

With Natalia – Courtesy Michelle Stafford

Thank you for welcoming Michelle Stafford to our celebrity bloggers series.

The two-time Emmy Award-winning actress is best known as Phyllis on The Young and the Restless, a role she played for 15 years.

Now mom to daughter Natalia Scout Lee, 3½, Stafford blogs on everything from body and style to decor and men on her “Doing It as a Single Chick” website.

She is currently the co-creator, co-writer and star of The Stafford Project, a web series that debuted in August. As a tongue-in-cheek depiction of Stafford’s life, the series has been called “terrific and audacious” by TV Guide.

The show can be viewed on her website and on YouTube. Additionally, Stafford, 48, can be found on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

Around this time last year, my sister Janine found out she had stage-three breast cancer. A couple of months ago, she was deemed “cancer free.”

She recently had her final surgery. She responded very well to her treatment; we know that we are lucky, that not all stories go this way. She attributes her success to her great doctors and the positivity she received from her family.

“Positivity.” It’s an interesting thing. You can’t pretend it. I believe you either are or you aren’t.

We all believed that my sister was going to get better. There was no other thought. Even in the darkest moments, there was no other thought.

Ready to race – Courtesy Michelle Stafford

During this past year’s journey, I looked very closely at my own life. My entire family was, in a sense, forced — by my sister’s condition — to examine their own lives. My conclusion: Life is a gift. It’s a gift. My question: What are you doing with it?

To me, it’s not about how much money you have or what “important” people you know. It’s not about cars or dresses or shoes. It’s about HOW you are living, what you are doing for others, what you are doing for yourself, what you are creating — what you are doing with this gift of life!

When I looked, I found answers … and frankly, they were bleak. I realized I wasn’t living the life I had wanted. So, I changed things around. Many people were stunned. Some didn’t understand.

I learned that you have got to live a life that is worth something to you. You have got to take chances, you have got to be bold. There are no mistakes. This road we’re on is created by ourselves. It’s either a fun ride or it isn’t. And it’s up to you. No one else decides for you.

Janine and me – Courtesy Michelle Stafford

My sister’s cancer obviously changed her life forever. But honestly, I must tell you, it made me examine my own life and who I am as a woman and human being. It made me more honest with myself, caused me to honestly address the choices I had made. And it gave me courage.

So, my message: LIVE! Take care of yourselves. Love yourselves. Live the life you want. There is no do-over; do it now.

This is just a letter to all of you beautiful, beautiful women. Take an honest look at the life you’re living and then address it. You may be surprised at what you find. You may even be shocked. But I believe you will never be sorry.

With Janine, my mom Paulette and Natalia – Courtesy Michelle Stafford

– Michelle Stafford

More from Michelle’s PEOPLE.com blog series:

• Michelle Stafford’s Blog: How I Became a Mom

Fall kisses – Courtesy Elisabeth Röhm

Elisabeth Röhm, best known for her roles as Serena on Law & Order and Kate on Angel, has been blogging for PEOPLE.com for over two years now.

The actress, 40, most recently played Taylor on The Client List, and will next star as Dolly in David O. Russell’s latest film, American Hustle, to be released Christmas Day.

Her book, Baby Steps: Having the Child I Always Wanted (Just Not As I Expected), was released in April.

She can be found on Facebook, Google + and on Twitter @ElisabethRohm.

In her latest blog, Röhm — mom to 5½-year-old Easton August with fiancé Ron Anthony — recalls her late mother’s love of learning and shares how she’s saving for her daughter’s future.

My mother died at the age of 60. Easton was just two years old. Of course, I feel my mother’s presence, encouragement and inspiration hourly.

But what of Easton, who knows my mother only through my storytelling and references to heaven? She’s almost a story herself, a thing of legend. And yet, when I hear Easton talk about my mom, I know I’m doing a great job of keeping her memory alive.

Easton is truly missing out in not knowing my mother Lisa in the flesh, but I talk about her all the time. Now that Easton is older, she asks all the time about my own childhood, about Mom and me. Not to mention, everything she was is in me and her memory breathes through me. If you’ve lost a parent you feel me, right ladies?

Sometimes when I caress Easton’s hair, I see my mother’s hands in my own. When I hug my daughter, I feel my mom’s arms around me for all the 37 years we shared together. When Easton and I talk from the heart and really get down to the nuts and bolts of things, I recall my mother’s incredible gift of communication.

Most importantly — this one affects us moment to moment — when I’m down and frustrated or joyful and inspired, I always have my love of life, information and knowledge as a touchstone. My mom was and will always be the smartest person I ever knew. She never gave up her interest in learning and participating.

I was lucky enough to be the benefactor of that cultivation. It is something I value and that I’m trying to pass on to Easton like a bright exciting torch. Saving for college is a top priority for my family and for Easton’s future and to encourage more people to prepare financially for college like we did, I’m working with Upromise by Sallie Mae.

It’s important to create a plan and savings goals and you can supplement your savings using a program like Upromise, from which you can earn money back for your college savings when you need to spend.

Easton’s other grandmother is my stepmother Jessica, who is also a person that you will never catch without a book nearby or in hand (she’s also saving for Easton’s college experience).

So, the good news is that both of Easton’s grandmothers are insatiable students and share in their different ways a thirst for life and endless quest in their curiosity. I think of the value of knowledge and the excitement my mother and stepmother stimulated through their love of books and words with gratitude.

My mama (that’s what Easton calls me still) delighted in poetry and literature, history, theology and science. My mother was someone who craved information. I’ll never forget how we pored over our Encyclopedia Britannica. Do you have those? Note to self: get them for Easton!

We would pick one of the many volumes and open to a random page where we could dive in and learn about absolutely everything. I’m sure all of that reading and love of discovery awakened my creativity as a writer and actor. Ultimately leading the desire to not only break through all my academic barriers of ADD and cyclones of distraction, but also the complicated feelings that consumed my heart regarding my parents’ divorce. Needless to say, those issues made learning very difficult for me at times in school.

Because of my mom, I persevered and made it to college. And because of Mom I graduated from Sarah Lawrence College (the finest source of education for someone like me). Every step held its challenges — I’m sure you will agree if you are in college, hope to go, or are paying off loans and the memory still lingers.

For me, the memory of college lingers too. Not only was it the most incredible gift my mother inspired me to value and that my father paid for, but also a gift of a lifetime as I’ve maneuvered through my pursuits both professionally and personally. That’s why I support Upromise as it can help families across America achieve their dreams of going to college.

Singlehandedly, I credit graduating as my ticket for making it as an artist. I’d stand before a director in an audition with my nerves jangling about and think, “Shoot, I graduated from college — that’s a lot harder than this audition!”

Confidence. Those years buy you a truck load of that!

Facepaint – Courtesy Elisabeth Röhm

Mom was a gifted student, but when she met my dad she became a college dropout. Still, she remained a student and taught me everything she knew or we learned together. Like I said, there are books she read to me as a child that birthed my love of storytelling, character, and moral dilemma (which is ultimately what movies and TV are all about). She did a great job with that.

She was always reading. Coming into her bedroom at any given time, there would be a pile of books on her nightstand or her nose would be buried in a good one and all I could see was her furrowed brow above the edges. Always worried when she’d have a furrowed brow (right?!), she’d scoop me up to ease my mind and tell me all about what she was reading. I try to remember to do the same with Easton. I try to share my delight in learning like Mom did.

My mom did the brave thing of going back to school when I was 8, got financial aid and made her dream of college happen although the debts for her were challenging as a single parent. Her struggles have taught me a lot, so I’m saving for Easton’s education wherever she chooses to go with Upromise. Now that I’m a mom I can only imagine the sheer courage it took to get it all done every day. To go out on that limb.

And SLC never let me give up on myself either. From the Donning system, to the conferences and the incredible financial aid, quitting was not an option. I believe that everything I’ve accomplished stems from the confidence that my college, my mother’s college and — hopefully if Easton lets me control all her choices (which we know will never happen) — could be Easton’s college of choice too.

We talked about it the other day and she shut me down. Thankfully, I have 10 more years to plead my case. I will always be indebted to Sarah Lawrence for giving me a place to grow my mind, heart and soul. It’s a place I return to again and again.

I know between Jessica and I we will make up for my mom not being here to awaken Easton’s thirst. Thankfully, she seems to have that curiosity. Well, I think we all do.

Although, on this almost anniversary of my mom passing, I’m sad too that Easton will never hear the soft lilt of my mother’s beautiful southern accent as she would read from a classic or perhaps the encyclopedia as she did with me so long ago.

My stepmother’s motto is, “Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it, boldness has genius, power and magic in it.” — Goethe (a writer I discovered at college).

So, let’s all take a step forward towards making that dream of learning easier for ourselves and our loved ones, possible and something we can’t live without … something we never stop.

Until next time,

– Elisabeth Röhm

More from Elisabeth’s PEOPLE.com blog series:

• Elisabeth Röhm’s Blog: When a Stranger Needs You
• Elisabeth Röhm’s Blog: Are Your Kids Zinging Yet?
• Elisabeth Röhm’s Blog: Locked Down in Boston with Easton

Elisabeth Rohm was a paid spokesperson for UPromise from June to October.

Elisabeth Rohm: ‘Jeremy Renner Is the Hottest Guy I’ve Ever Worked With’

Celebrity blogger Jenna von Oy is a new mama!

Best known for her roles as Six on Blossom and Stevie on The Parkers, von Oy is also a musician who has released two albums and is set to publish a book, The Betweeners.

von Oy, 36, wed Brad Bratcher on Oct. 10, 2010, and resides in Nashville with her husband and five dogs.

They welcomed their first child, daughter Gray Audrey, in May 2012. She is now 18 months old.

You can find her on Facebook and Twitter @JennavonOy, as well as posting on her weekly blog, The Cradle Chronicles.

In her latest blog, von Oy expresses gratitude for the gadgets and gizmos that have given her an edge in motherhood.

Mimosa Arts Photography

It’s that time of year when we conduct November’s annual rite of passage, gathering around the family table and mercilessly stuffing our faces full of mashed potatoes, chestnut dressing, and turkey (or turducken, if you’re slightly more ambitious with your culinary skills).

We join hands and give thanks for the blessings bestowed upon us throughout the year, reminisce about the time Uncle Bob spilled his eggnog in the cranberry sauce (talk about “sauced”), and dream of a utopian future which will enable us to beam in robot housekeepers who won’t bemoan the number of pesky after-dinner dishes piling up in our kitchen sink.

Once the harvest meal is through, we crash on the couch in a supposed Tryptophan-induced stupor, absent-mindedly watching the Macy’s Day Parade and pretending to be interested in the football games that follow, before foolishly over-indulging in round two of the day’s leftovers and repeating the grisly cycle yet again.

In anticipation of the forthcoming December holidays, some of us begin our yearly trek to the far corners of our attic to fetch ornaments and stockings (or other related symbols of the season), grumbling about untangling Christmas tree lights and wondering how last year’s evergreen is still managing to scatter prickly little needles across our living room, despite its current status as garden mulch. If we’re lucky, our children have come down from their pumpkin pie sugar high before bedtime, and we aren’t up all night nursing tummy aches — theirs or our own — or having night terrors about drunken mall Santas and 4 a.m. Black Friday shopping sprees.

But I digress. Despite the holiday chaos and impending post-Thanksgiving malaise, the point of November’s celebratory feast remains. Appropriate to its namesake, I’m thankful for every bit of it. I hope some of what I’m grateful for is a given — that my past blog posts have exposed, and properly honored, my gratitude for my loved ones and the gifts we’ve been granted.

I’m optimistic that most of you read between the silly and sarcastic lines I write, and see through to the intentions beneath them. Because all joking aside, I’m exceedingly thankful for the ability to wake up every morning to the man I love and our enchanting, wondrous daughter. I absolutely adore being a wife and mommy, and nothing makes me happier than spending my days chasing after a little girl who never stops challenging the amount of love I thought I was capable of possessing in one lifetime! The extent of my appreciation cannot fit within the confines of this post; the only thing truly large enough to hold it all is my heart.

With that said, and in keeping with the Thanksgiving spirit, I wanted to offer you a somewhat satirical rendition of a list of parent-related items I’m especially thankful for this year. Having a baby has made me infinitely more conscious of how I’ve taken smaller details for granted in the past. So this year, when I sit down to extend my acknowledgment and praise on Turkey Day, I’m giving some of those vital helping hands a little love too. In no particular order:

• Roomba: You are one hell of a workhorse. Thank you for cleaning up wayward goldfish crumbs, the miscellaneous vegetable peels that miss the compost can, and the sporadic piles of paper strips that accumulate when my daughter succeeds in getting a hold of the napkin dispenser.

You allow me to enjoy my little girl’s penchant for making a mess, without stressing that I can’t get it cleaned up before company arrives. Not to mention, you suck up those giant dog hair tumbleweeds that collect in forgotten corners of our house, and you don’t even complain about it!

Best of all, you are a true caffeine martyr. You save me from hyperactive canines — and kids, for that matter — by digesting the fallen coffee beans that my husband always seems to send skittering across our kitchen floor as he refills the grinder. (Lord knows my life is hectic enough, without having a caffeinated Pug on my hands!)

I know we keep you busier than Charlie Sheen‘s attorney these days, but you handle it with style and grace … despite your propensity to trap yourself in the bathroom and aimlessly spin in circles for hours — which I personally find hilarious.

Barclay & Brandice DeVeau

• Mr. Morning Cup of Coffee (and your sidekicks, Second Cup & Third Cup): You are my lifelines and my curative comrades. Thank you for your support and guidance, especially on those chilly mornings when I want to crawl back into bed and can’t or shouldn’t. You’ve gotten me through many a blog post, including this one!

• Flashlight Army: I’m not exactly sure why my hubby owns more of you than he owns pairs of shoes, but I’ll admit you earn your keep. You bring new meaning to the phrase, “location, location, location!”

Thank you for helping to unearth the plethora of books, toys, crayons, and sippy cup straws our daughter hides under the couch. Without you, she’d be hoarding the entire utensil drawer under there — even the stray plastic sporks we’ve been compelled to save from random take-out orders.

Also, thank you for shedding light on the errant dog kibble that stows away under our rugs and drives our dogs crazy. Their endless pawing to retrieve the damn things makes me crazy, so you’ve essentially contributed toward my mental stability.

The Cradle Chronicles

• Baby Proof Toilet Latch: My husband and I have discovered that you exist almost as much for the sanity of the parent, as for the safety of the child. Thank you for keeping little fingers from getting crushed under the weight of that maniacal and spastic toilet bowl lid (I swear he has it in for all of us!), and thank you for your constant protection. You are an unparalleled sentinel, saving every hairbrush, sock, lipstick, toothpaste tube, and toilet paper roll from certain death in a watery grave.

• iVy iPod (my kitschy nickname for my iPod): Thank you for the constant Raffi and Little Mermaid earworms you gift me on a daily basis. You are too kind! You provide tunes while my daughter bathes, encouraging her to splash water all over the room … and the walls. And the dogs. To some, this may sound like a thankless job, but you are also helping Gray to express herself through music, and for that I am eternally grateful. Your choice of artists may not always be up my alley, but you literally (and figuratively) rock.

• Elmo: Thank you for being Gray’s little buddy. She loves watching your show; you are by far the most famous TV star in our house! Gray is especially fond of the fact that your picture is on the front of her current set of diapers, and she’s a big fan of your Potty Time with Elmo book lately, so … perhaps I should also thank you for any future assistance you can offer in that department.

• Sir Step Stool: Pretty soon Gray will be taller than me, and I swear you won’t be quite as overworked and underpaid. In the meantime, thanks for helping me stow every fragile/sharp/inedible/irreparable/irreplaceable item out of Gray’s reach. Oh yeah, and bonus points for being collapsible, so you aren’t providing her with yet another piece of furniture to climb on!

The Cradle Chronicles

• Hat Posse: I appreciate that you don’t discriminate — that your clique encompasses every shape, size, and level of fashion-awareness. You don’t need to be Haute Couture to make my daughter smile, and you manage to make her do that without fail. Turns out, you are the one thing that can thwart a foul mood in our house! (We discovered this one evening when she begged for you amidst tears and sniffling, then immediately started laughing once you were atop her head.)

Despite the fact that I swore you and your kind off after a case of oversaturation during the Blossom years, you’ve restored my faith. You’ve cured teething woes just by being present, and proven to be a successful source of distraction when a tantrum is on the horizon.

• The Crayola Crayon Coterie: Thank you for providing Gray with endless hours of fun and entertainment, even if you aren’t fond of sticking to the coloring book playground we’ve designated for you. I’m hoping one of these days your crew will stop “accidentally” wandering onto our refrigerator and front door, but I think I can see through to forgiving your transgressions. Particularly since you amuse my budding artist long enough for me to cook dinner!

The Cradle Chronicles

• Disinfecting Wipes: Thank you for cleaning up after the aforementioned “Crayon Coterie.” Those guys can get a little out of hand, and you’re always there to swoop in and save the day. Likewise, you do a remarkable job of sanitizing our grocery store carts before we wheel around the produce aisle, which I imagine staves off some of those foul, nasty germ miscreants.

As a side note, I also owe you some kudos for getting the crusty oatmeal off of the couch cushions yesterday, and the Basset Hound drool off of the curtains last week.

• Kitchen Pots & Pans: You assist me in feeding my family and you double as an impromptu drum set for my kid. What more can I ask for?

• Water: Most folks simply see you as good ol’ H2O, but I know better. You’ve taught my daughter to drink through a straw, kept her from being obsessed with sugary juice drinks, cleaned strawberries off of her face and paint off of her clothes, and let her endlessly splash you around during tub time. Best of all, you tame her Einstein hair, which is no easy feat, let me tell you!

The Cradle Chronicles

• Boogie Wipes: This should be self-explanatory. You deserve a standing ovation for keeping Gray’s nose happy and snot-free. I don’t know how you do it, but you actually inspire her to ask me to clean her nose, instead of running for the hills every time a box of tissue makes an appearance. How awesome are you??

In fact, I’m so grateful that I’ve even written you your very own ditty to the melody of that funky 70′s disco tune, “Boogie Nights.” It’s a pretty catchy interpretation, if I do say so myself! (That is, if you like waxing poetic about slime.)

And last but not least…

• Her Excellency, Madame Glass of Wine: Your occasional presence, after our sweet baby is off in dreamland for the night, is much appreciated. Every now and then, we like your company at the end of a long and trying evening, so thank you for offering my husband and I an opportunity to celebrate the success of getting through another day of parenting!

We aren’t always graceful or perfect in that undertaking, but we sure do love every minute of it! You remind us to stop and take a moment out for ourselves, and you encourage us to put our feet up for a few minutes, appreciate our alone time together, and cherish all of the wonderful memories from the day.

We’ve collected many special bottles of you over the years, thanks to special occasions and our travels, and it has been nice getting to know each and every one of you. A toast to your friendship!

Obviously, the above list is a partial one. Nary a day goes by that I don’t realize how indebted I am to the various gadgets and gizmos that aid and abet my parenting! The truth is that motherhood requires assistance, and I’ve found it can come through a myriad of different channels: family members, friends, teachers, medical professionals and apparently, even miscellaneous household products.

I hope I’ve made you laugh a bit, and maybe even opened your eyes to the wonderful world of indispensable inanimate objects. They can be our parenting partners in crime! So this Thanksgiving, as you sit down to spread heartfelt love and thanks to those around you, I urge you to give a brief round of applause for the little guys … because no one should be exempt from a little validation. Even robot vacuums.

Wishing you and your family a happy, healthy, blessed, and thankful holiday season!

Until next time…

 - Jenna von Oy

P.S. Any reference to a specific brand or item in my blog is because I felt it would make the post funnier, or give you more insight into what we actually use around the house. I wasn’t compensated for any of these mentions, and it doesn’t denote any sponsorship by PEOPLE.com.

More from Jenna’s PEOPLE.com blog series:

• Jenna von Oy’s Blog: An Ode to October and Our Wedding Day
• Jenna von Oy’s Blog: Hell Hath No Fury Like a Mommy Scorned
• Jenna von Oy’s Blog: Embracing the ‘Back to School’ Spirit

Please give a warm welcome to our newest celebrity blogger, Amanda Beard!

The seven-time Olympic medalist first appeared on the sports scene at the 1996 Atlanta games, walking away with her first gold for the medley relay and two silvers for the 100 and 200-meter breaststrokes — all at the age of 14.

Since then, the competitive swimmer scored a bronze medal at the 2000 Sydney Olympics, and her first individual gold medal along with two silvers at the 2004 Athens games.

Beard, who is sponsored by Aqua Sphere, recently penned her memoir, In the Water They Can’t See You Cry.

She and her husband Sacha Brown married in May 2009 and are the proud parents of son Blaise Ray, 4, and daughter Doone Isla, 5 months.

Beard can be found online on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter @AmandaRayBeard.

Courtesy Amanda Beard

Where did this year go?! It seems like just yesterday that it was June and we were welcoming Doone into our lives. Now we’re diving into the holiday season, have a little girl with a big personality, and have somewhat adjusted to life as a family of four.

One thing I’ve come to (or perhaps, have been forced to) embrace, is the fact that life is truly a juggling act. It’s all about multitasking and becoming a master at it! My day is full of taking care of our children, working out and running my business. Add to that a busy holiday season, and the day-to-day can seem nearly impossible at times.

Although training for Rio 2016 is a huge priority in my life, I’m still a mom (and unfortunately not a super hero, like my son), and can’t always make it to the gym or the pool. This is when the juggling act kicks in.

Courtesy Amanda Beard

On days like those, I pop Doone into her stroller, and make calls for work during a lengthy walk around my neighborhood. While it’s not always my ideal workout, I’ve learned that making fitness a priority — whether it’s a hardcore swim session or a simple power walk — is key to staying fit and sane during the holidays.

It’s true that time flies when you’re having fun, and to say that this year has been fun, exciting and blessed in so many ways, would be an understatement.

In lieu of the coming holidays, I asked Blaise what he’s thankful for. “I’m thankful for all of my toys!” he replied. Gotta love a 4-year-old!

What was meant to be an offhand question to chat with Blaise as we baked pies last weekend, actually got me thinking. If you ask me what I’m thankful for in my life right now, it’s an easy answer: my friends, family and especially my kids and husband.

However, if you had asked me at age 4, 14 or even 24 what I was thankful for, it would’ve also likely included something like: my toys! My wardrobe! My car! For that reason, I really can’t blame Blaise for his honest answer.

Courtesy Amanda Beard

As we get older and our lives change, our perspective incrementally changes too. Through the years, I’ve realized how blessed we are by the people in our lives and less by the things in our lives.

I wouldn’t be who I am (or where I am) without people like Sacha, who pushes and encourages me to think bigger and better every day; like Blaise and Doone, who challenge and inspire me, and think I’m totally awesome the way I am; and even my sponsors like Aqua Sphere, that believe in me as an athlete, and allow me to swim, compete and follow my dreams.

The clothes and car that I adored through my teens and 20s, in retrospect, were fun, but not essential to my life — and definitely didn’t deserve the attention I paid to them. As I’ve grown up, I’ve come to realize that material things make our lives big, but not full.

Since becoming a mom, I’ve grappled with the often-daunting feeling that most moms get, “Am I doing this right?” Teaching your kids things like swimming is pretty straightforward: you jump in the pool, you kick your feet, you move your arms and you’re swimming. However, teaching your kids things like sharing, kindness and thankfulness are a bit different. Oftentimes, these are the things that our kids learn from us, versus something we can teach them.

Courtesy Amanda Beard

For this reason, Sacha and I know that it’s our jobs to set the best examples for Blaise and Doone, and to constantly think critically about our actions so that our kids (hopefully) pick up our best habits and principles.

Here are some things we’re actively doing right now to set great examples for our kids to breed the principles that we value:

Staying active: Although our lives can get (very, very) crazy and hectic in our house, we make it a point to get active often. Blaise hangs out with me at the pool a lot and we take walks together as a family almost every day.

Trying new things: As I mentioned earlier, Blaise and I woke up last weekend with an itch to get creative in the kitchen. This is the first year during the holidays where Blaise has been old enough to really help out in the kitchen. He had a ton of fun adding ingredients to the bowl, stirring, and clapping his flour-crusted hands together. I love seeing how engaged he is when he’s learning something new.

Courtesy Amanda Beard

Creating traditions: After Thanksgiving dinner each year, we bust out Jenga or some cards to play Hearts. Even though we’re usually full and drowsy, we stay around the table because we know how much fun we have — and because we’ve done it every year since I can remember.

While the games themselves are trivial, the meaning behind them is what we love: the comfort, the closeness and the sense of belonging we feel each year when we start an old familiar game. Plus, it’s fun to get the competitive juices flowing!

Being thankful: Blaise, you deserve a little more credit from Mommy! When I asked him what he was thankful for, in addition to his toys, he also sweetly added that he’s thankful for his little sister, and that he hopes that she gets big soon so she can play. Aww.

Courtesy Amanda Beard

How are you staying fit this holiday season? What is your juggling act like? What are you thankful for this year?

Cheers,

– Amanda Beard

More from Amanda’s PEOPLE.com blog series:

• Amanda Beard’s Blog: Meet My Family!

Video Flashback: Celebs Reveal Their Secret Olympic Dreams

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Our celebrity blogger Marla Sokoloff is a new mama!

Since audiences first got to know her at age 12 as Gia on Full House, Sokoloff has had many memorable TV roles — Jody on Party of Five, Lucy on The Practice, Claire on Desperate Housewives – as well as turns on the big screen in Whatever It Takes, Dude, Where’s My Car? and Sugar & Spice.

Sokoloff, 32, also sings and plays guitar and released an album, Grateful, in 2005.

She wed her husband, music composer Alec Puro, in November 2009 and the couple — plus pup Coco Puro — make their home in Los Angeles.

You can find Marla, now mom to 22-month-old daughter Elliotte Anne, on Twitter.

Courtesy Marla Sokoloff

Well, I finally did it. I said I would never — and truly wasn’t sure I could ever — but I did it … I left Elliotte behind in Los Angeles so I could travel to work in Chicago for nine long days.

Before you judge and allow your jaw to drop at the thought of leaving your child behind to work out of town, let me explain why I chose to not take her along for the journey.

The hours on set can be incredibly long, sometimes the workday begins before my daughter wakes and ends long after she goes to sleep. I was risking her not seeing me at all for most of my stay. Also, Elliotte (like most children) is a complete creature of habit; she loves her toys, her dog, her walks, her play dates, and her bed. Taking her away from all of that didn’t seem completely fair. In fact, the more I thought about it, the decision to take her with me seemed more selfish than selfless.

It was a decision that I agonized over as I haven’t spent one single day away from her in her entire 21 months of life, but at the end of the day, I realized she would be way happier with my husband and the help of our trusted nanny while I was gone.

Both my mom and my mother-in-law live close by and were ready to jump in if need be. (Let’s be honest — they were both chomping at the bit to steal Elliotte for a sleepover!) It truly takes a village!

While away, I was flooded with conflicting emotion. I love what I do — always have, always will. It feels incredibly familiar to be on set as this is a job I’ve had for 20 plus years. But for 21 months, it has had a whole new feel.

I’m no longer the nomad actress who travels around the world within a day’s notice. I’m now a mommy. Not only does my sweet daughter depend on me, but also my husband depends on me in ways he never has before.

Courtesy Marla Sokoloff

I can’t just hop on a plane on a Friday to start work on a Monday in Ireland or something of the like as I had in the past. There are so many variables, so many pieces to the family puzzle that need to be just so before I can take a job. This is primarily why I haven’t worked outside of Los Angeles since her birth.

Of course the main reason for me hunkering down was my intense desire to work in L.A. and keep our family together, but the second biggest hurdle is I just can’t seem to get past the intense guilt I feel about breaking up my family so I can continue to pursue my dream.

So that leaves me to the ever present question that my friends and I just can’t seem to answer: Can we be working mommies without the working mommy guilt?

This question doesn’t just pertain to me as an actress obviously — it affects every mom who decides that staying home full time isn’t for them or isn’t possible for their family. Whatever the case may be, I’ve come to realize that doing it all — and feeling 100 percent successful at both — just isn’t something I’ve mastered yet. I’m starting to wonder if I ever will.

I don’t want to say the cliché we can’t HAVE it all. That feels crazy to me because just being able to have a family in and of itself feels like having it all in my humble opinion. But we still want to maintain some of our old pre-baby self — I understand because I do too.

I sobbed and sobbed and SOBBED in my bedroom as the car waited outside to take me to airport. I got it all out before saying goodbye to Elliotte because everyone kept telling me that my perpetual tears might scare her. (Why? Would your hysterical snot covered mom scare you?)

I knew I had nine long days ahead of me without my baby and it was going to be brutal, but I also had this other side of me that was crazy excited to start a new job. I was riddled with guilt. Anytime I had an adrenalized thought about going to shoot or what my days on set would be like, they were quickly squashed with feelings of remorse.

Why did I feel so bad about something I had worked so hard for? Something I did for most of life before having a child? Suddenly it became the other woman in my life if you will, this scandalous affair that I snuck out of town to spend time with and felt so wrong paying any attention to. Even something small like ordering room service felt so overindulgent I was ashamed to tell my husband when he called to say goodnight.

My time in Chicago was wildly eye opening for me. In typical girl fashion, I talked about my self-diagnosed mommy guilt with any mommy friend that would listen and came to the conclusion that the majority of us feel this way no matter what the circumstances.

Courtesy Marla Sokoloff

I’m back to work in Los Angeles and I still can’t shake the feeling of letting my little girl down as I leave for the day. I do the best I can to make sure she is taken care of and has all the comforts she needs while I’m gone, but when that scraped knee happens and she is crying for Mommy, it truly breaks my heart that I’m not there to kiss it for her.

I decided to dig a bit deeper. I rallied a few of my mommy friends together and asked them how they do it because they all seem to be kicking butt in every facet of their lives and I wanted some tips.

The question was: “Do you have mommy guilt while working and if so, do you have any tips or tricks to make it easier on you or your child?”

Here are their answers …

Lindsay Sloane (Actress & Maxwell’s mommy)
Yes! When I’m at home and exhausted from playing hide-and-seek for the 25th time all I think about is how I wish I were working. Then, when I am working, all I do is sit and stare at pictures of Maxwell and feel horrible guilt and sadness that I am not with her (although I did recently read a WHOLE magazine at work and that was a very exciting day).

To combat the guilt I make sure that her day will be busy (having a nanny that I trust means everything), I call and face time when I can (especially to say good night), and I have her come visit me at work for lunch or dinner if it’s possible. My heart goes out to the working moms who may not have these luxuries. It’s tough to feel torn between two worlds.

Stacy Marble (Deputy Chief of Staff for L.A. City Councilman Tom LaBonge & Eleanor’s mommy)
I actually don’t feel mommy guilt about working. I think it’s healthy for me to work. I’m serving as a role model for my daughter. My mommy guilt seeps in when I’m frantically getting ready for work and she is on the iPad watching Barney.

Zoe Winkler Reinis (Teacher & Ace’s Mommy)
I definitely have guilt! Especially when my friends are planning fun things with the kids and I can’t join because I have work. There was a day a few weeks ago that Ace was sick with a stomach virus. I had to go to work and he cried hysterically when I left, which never happens. I got in the car and hysterically cried and then called Robert (my husband) and yelled at him, which made me feel slightly better and then of course worse.

As for tricks, I try and make sure that when I am home I am really focused on Ace. On my days off, we do music class together and have a play date every week which is fun.

Honestly I am lucky that I only work 3 days a week and I believe that it is harder on me than it is on Ace. I have an AMAZING support team and my nanny and I communicate all day and I trust her with every part of my being which makes it easier.

Courtesy Marla Sokoloff

So Mommies (and Daddies!) — what do you think? Do you feel this dreaded guilt? I would love to hear from those of you that do as well as from those of you who don’t have it.

Let’s discuss. Leave a comment below or send me a tweet @marlasok.

xo,

– Marla Sokoloff

More from Marla’s PEOPLE.com blog series:

• Marla Sokoloff’s Blog: Chatting with Rachael Leigh Cook
• Marla Sokoloff’s Blog: No … I Really Mean It
• Marla Sokoloff’s Blog: Elliotte Anne’s Numero Uno … and Baby No. 2?

Please give a warm welcome to our newest celebrity blogger, Amanda Beard!

The seven-time Olympic medalist first appeared on the sports scene at the 1996 Atlanta games, walking away with her first gold for the medley relay and two silvers for the 100 and 200-meter breaststrokes — all at the age of 14.

Since then, the competitive swimmer scored a bronze medal at the 2000 Sydney Olympics, and her first individual gold medal along with two silvers at the 2004 Athens games.

Beard, who is sponsored by Aqua Sphere, recently penned her memoir, In the Water They Can’t See You Cry.

She and her husband Sacha Brown married in May 2009 and are the proud parents of son Blaise Ray, 4, and daughter Doone Isla, 6 months.

Beard can be found online on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter @AmandaRayBeard.

Courtesy Amanda Beard

Happy Holidays, friends!

In addition to Christmas and New Year’s, this month marks several important milestones in our family.

First of all, happy six-month birthday to our beautiful girl, Doone. Ever since you came into our lives, your everlasting smile has made our lives better. You’ve totally stolen our hearts; life with you is incredible.

Second, a big thank you to our resident superhero, Blaise, who is coming into his role as a big brother like a champ. Earlier this month, he asked me to show him how to make a bottle so that he can prep a bottle and feed Doone. His helpfulness and love for his sister impresses me every day, making him the sweetest superhero that we know.

Courtesy Amanda Beard

Third, I am happy to report that I am so close to reaching my pre-Doone weight, and although trying to lose weight during the holidays can be difficult, I’m determined to make it through.

For every mom out there trying to get back in pre-pregnancy shape — or those just looking to stay in shape during the holidays — behold: my practical wisdom for obtaining your fitness goals.

Set smart goals. I’ve been setting SMART goals ever since I became a competitive swimmer. SMART stands for Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant and Time-bound.

My current SMART goals include:

• Losing the last 10-15 pounds of my baby weight by March, when Doone is nine months old
• Swimming competitively again in six months

I plan to obtain these goals by swimming and weightlifting six days a week, being active with my family, and eating as many whole foods as I can.

Switch it up. I’ve been swimming for 28 years, so keeping things new, engaging and fun is key to achieving results. While I’ll always continue to leverage my tried-and-true training workouts, like using Aqua Sphere’s aquatic exercise gear to practice my stroke and speed, I really try to switch up my cross-training fitness interests a couple times during the year to stay interested.

Courtesy Amanda Beard

Recently, I’ve been training with my local U.S. Masters team, doing hour-long CrossFit classes and mountain biking on the trails behind my house (although, fellow mountain bikers, take caution: my riding nickname is “Crash”).

Quality over quantity. One of the biggest challenges in training for Rio 2016 is finding someone to watch the kiddos, so I champion this statement as it applies to fitness and training.

Pool sprints, CrossFit and circuit training are all incredible workouts that don’t require hours of commitment each day. These quick, high-intensity workouts are a 2014 fitness trend for a reason: they’re a super effective way to achieve results.

Courtesy Amanda Beard

Fitness is a journey, not a destination. My outlook on training for Rio 2016 has changed dramatically compared to previous years, when, like most Olympic athletes, I was known to let training consume and stress me out.

Since this is most likely the last time that I’ll be training for an Olympic games, I’m much more relaxed.

Here’s my plan: Make my workouts count, kick butt for my family and my sponsors like Aqua Sphere, stress less, and smile the whole time. My focus has shifted (hey, any mom will tell you that!), but my determination to dominate remains solid.

Courtesy Amanda Beard

Last but not least, we’re excited to celebrate our first Christmas as a family of four. While shopping for babies is fun (who doesn’t love gifting swaddles and baby headbands?), shopping for moms is a little trickier.

Thus, you’ll find a list below of my favorite things that are perfect for the fit mom in your life. Move over, Oprah!

Courtesy Amanda Beard

Aqua Sphere’s Kayenne Ladies goggles ($27.95): Aqua Sphere’s Kayenne Ladies goggles feature a 180-degree view of the pool, have an easily-adjustable band, are 100 percent UV protected and won’t fog or scratch. Plus they won’t leave those annoying goggle rings around your face!

Bath Bombs by Lush ($4.95): Lush makes bath bombs that come in the cutest shapes and colors. I stock up on these before Christmas to give as gifts each year.

Aqua Sphere’s Ursula swim suit ($64.95): Ursula is an ideal swim suit for an active swimmer that wants to be comfortable and perform great in and out of the water.

French press coffee maker ($49.95): All I can say is “YUM!!!” and bring on the caffeine!

Comfy Pajamas: It’s a tradition in our house that everyone gets new pajamas every Christmas Eve, just in time for cooler weather.

Mission Skincare Organic Strawberry Lip Balm ($2.38): Mission Skincare is a line of products developed by professional athletes. I worked with the development team for this product, knowing that SPF and major moisture are key lip balm ingredients for in the pool and out!

Courtesy Amanda Beard

I wish you all a truly happy holiday season and New Year. I’ll be back in 2014, and am looking forward to talking more about New Year’s fitness resolutions.

I’m even more excited to share news about a product that I’m working on with Aqua Sphere.

See you next year!

– Amanda Beard

Amanda is an Aqua Sphere-sponsored athlete and the co-founder of Mission Athletecare.

More from Amanda’s PEOPLE.com blog series:

• Amanda Beard’s Blog: Full of Thanks
• Amanda Beard’s Blog: Meet My Family!

Thank you for welcoming Michelle Stafford to our celebrity bloggers series.

The two-time Emmy Award-winning actress is best known as Phyllis on The Young and the Restless, a role she played for 15 years.

Now mom to daughter Natalia Scout Lee, 4, Stafford blogs on everything from body and style to decor and men on her “Doing It as a Single Chick” website.

She is currently the co-creator, co-writer and star of The Stafford Project, a Web series that debuted in August. As a tongue-in-cheek depiction of Stafford’s life, the series has been called “terrific and audacious” by TV Guide.

The show can be viewed on her website and on YouTube. Additionally, Stafford, 48, can be found on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

Ray Kachatorian

I think people who have children are secretly jealous of those who don’t. Otherwise, why would they try so hard to make them feel bad for being childless?

I was just looking at my Instagram. I follow the designer Zac Posen, who is a genius and shows his very cool designs often on his site.

He just wrote something about a last-minute scheduling change that would have him flying off to Sydney, Australia, in two days. I mean, how fun. I thought to myself, “Wow, if someone said, ‘Hey, wanna go to Sydney in two days?’ I would be incredibly stressed!”

Should I bring Natalia? If I did, I would need a nanny. If I didn’t, where would she stay? If I went alone and the plane crashed, she’d be parentless. If I went alone, I’d miss her. If I brought her, would it be a major pain in the ass — and am I a bad mom for even thinking that?

I mean, Zac didn’t have these thoughts. He’s just going to Sydney.

Courtesy Michelle Stafford

I do remember the days that I just got up and went. I still don’t think I am used to having another person in my life to get ready. That’s why I’m always 45 minutes late to everything and look haggard when I get there.

Oh! No! I used to spend TIME getting ready. I mean, now with my daughter there is always the time spent on talking her out of keeping her pajamas on. And she doesn’t want to eat the beets I made. And she doesn’t want to brush her hair — and when she finally agrees to brushing it, it’s a lot of screaming and crying.

I’m brushing it too hard. It hurts. She wants it in pigtails, not a ponytail. She wants it loose and not in pigtails. She wants to wear a dress. No, not that dress! She wants the sparkly shoes, not the boots. She wants the jacket, not the sweater … Ooooooy!

Listen, don’t get me wrong. I LOVE being a mother and wouldn’t change it for the world.

But all I’m saying is, all you single folks without kids (and it wasn’t that long ago that I was one of you), next time a parent tries to make you feel bad for not having kids just say, “Oh sorry, I didn’t hear you. I was too busy making plans for my last-minute trip to Bora Bora.”

Courtesy Michelle Stafford

Believe me, that will get ‘em …

– Michelle Stafford

More from Michelle’s PEOPLE.com blog series:

• Michelle Stafford’s Blog: Cancer’s Big Life Lesson
• Michelle Stafford’s Blog: How I Became a Mom